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Why can't people just be nice?

DuckBread

I'm sorry for posting this here... I'm just really upset and want to get it off my chest.

I was just walking home and some guy rolled his car window down to yell at me. I didn't even hear the first part of what he said, but it ended with, "You fat b***ch". This isn't even the first time this has happened to me.

I don't care what this scumbag thinks of my appearance - he probably has no life and is clearly a tragic person if the only way he can feel good about himself is to put other people down. What upsets me the most is the principle of it. He doesn't know all the things I'm going through. He doesn't know that my walk home is exhausting because I've spent the entire day trying to 'blend in'. He doesn't know that I have depression and anxiety. Even if he did know all these things, he probably wouldn't care. I'm also annoyed at myself for telling him to "f*** off" - he probably wanted that reaction. I just got caught in the moment.

It worries me that these things happen to other people too - I can't bear the thought that people who are already insecure have to listen to things like this.

It's not just this man though... people can be so volatile towards each other. I'm seeing all these insults directed at Greta Thunberg (not about climate change - personal insults), and I just can't understand why people think it's okay to verbally attack a young girl.

I know that there are lots of amazing people in the world (lots in this forum too), and the majority of people are kind and have good intentions. I just need some help remembering that sometimes.

Can anyone share some positivity? I'd like to hear some nice stories.

Parents

  • Its a jungle out there, seems a lot of people are rushing around angry at things, or other people.  There is a book called Chimp Paradox: The Mind Management Programme which explains it all, and its helped me to understand myself and other people better - I recommend it because it can help you to choose how you react to other people.

    Its easy to get angry back, or withdrawn into yourself, because those are natural responses to a threat, but instead you can choose to react calmly, and just let go of angry thoughts or feelings, and go back to your day.  You can't change these people, only change your response.  The stuff thrown at Greta Thunberg is a good example of how society treats people who think, or act, appear, or behave differently (not just autistic people) - it lashes out to try to weaken or shut down people it doesn't understand, or doesn't tolerate.  Greta deals with it well, you have to keep going and be yourself - keep calm and carry on.

    I've also read Overcoming Anxiety and Depression on the Autism Spectrum: A Self-Help Guide Using CBT by Lee A. Wilkinson, which helps you to be more in control of yourself and your thoughts, rather than letting upsetting situations eat away at you.  It also teaches you that how you feel is down to you, not other people, and therefore you can learn to change how you react to people and choose to feel different.  You don't have to feel depressed, or anxious - focus on things you can feel good about, such as yourself, or Greta saving the planet, or your favourite things or interests.

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  • Its a jungle out there, seems a lot of people are rushing around angry at things, or other people.  There is a book called Chimp Paradox: The Mind Management Programme which explains it all, and its helped me to understand myself and other people better - I recommend it because it can help you to choose how you react to other people.

    Its easy to get angry back, or withdrawn into yourself, because those are natural responses to a threat, but instead you can choose to react calmly, and just let go of angry thoughts or feelings, and go back to your day.  You can't change these people, only change your response.  The stuff thrown at Greta Thunberg is a good example of how society treats people who think, or act, appear, or behave differently (not just autistic people) - it lashes out to try to weaken or shut down people it doesn't understand, or doesn't tolerate.  Greta deals with it well, you have to keep going and be yourself - keep calm and carry on.

    I've also read Overcoming Anxiety and Depression on the Autism Spectrum: A Self-Help Guide Using CBT by Lee A. Wilkinson, which helps you to be more in control of yourself and your thoughts, rather than letting upsetting situations eat away at you.  It also teaches you that how you feel is down to you, not other people, and therefore you can learn to change how you react to people and choose to feel different.  You don't have to feel depressed, or anxious - focus on things you can feel good about, such as yourself, or Greta saving the planet, or your favourite things or interests.

Children