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Need things to do with my aspie husband

NAS63398

My husband and I have been married only a few months and we have nothing to do together. I’m not overly interested in his special interest but when I have tried to play he doesn’t want to play with me. We sometimes watch tv together but one we don’t always like the same things and two I want something other then watching Netflix. What are some shared activities that other people do that don’t necessarily mean leaving the house?

Parents

  • No offence but 'Ugh!' as Plastic says, you don't have to do everything together... a lot of people would probably love the fact that their partner was happy for them to pursue their interests independently...

    Maybe if you could share what some of his and your current interests are we could offer some ideas.

    Personally I get really pissed off when my (NT) wife is all "We never do anything together" and I say "OK, what do you want to do?" and she says "I don't know..."

    What did you do before you were married? Surely you either did stuff together, if so why can't you continue doing it now you're married? If you didn't do stuff together you must have been OK with that or why get married?

    Er, sorry all the above is a bit 'straight-talking autie'...!!

  • Former Member
    Former Member in reply to Original Prankster

    Sounds like you both might need to go through a bit of trial and error to finds what works for you?  My NT husband has time in the week where he does his own things, as I do I (the aspie). As much as we like time alone, we both believe its key for us to have shared interests for our specific relationship to survive. We usually spend a minimum of two nights a week doing joint things, including going out for walks, eating out, cuddling whilst watching tv etc. When we sit at the table, or in the living room, doing our own thing but being together it doesn't feel like quality couple time for us and neither of us find it fulfilling for our relationship

  • in reply to Former Member

    LOL! 12 years into married life & 17 together... so I think we're doing OK Wink

    We do a lot of things together: visit National Trust places, cycling, gym classes, watch TV, she'll play solitaire while I'm reading, she gets a head massage (from me) while I'm watching TV...

    It was more the specific situation where I'm quite happily doing my own thing and she's sort of "I'm bored - entertain me!" & I'm all Rolling eyes...

  • in reply to NAS63398

    What did you do when you were dating? What drew you to each other? Are these things that you could rekindle?

    Also, Google "dating aspergers guy" and you get a ton of results... some might help

  • in reply to Original Prankster

    I think one of my problems is I don’t have any hobbies and we don’t really like the same tv shows so it’s hard to just hang out

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