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Safeguarding - I'm shocked!

dodson

Hi everyone

I am new to the site but I wanted to speak somewhere I felt comfortable.

I have a little girl who is 6, she has been diagnosed with Autism for 3 years now and attends special school full time - she has been doing really well!

Our life seemed to be running pretty smoothly, only a few recent bumps in the road... but the last 24 hours have felt like a car crash for our family.

I was told only yesterday that my child may have been physically abused by her T.A. Now I don't want to make it sound worse than it was - I'm not talking about being beaten up here, more like grabbing/pushing/pulling/screaming in face without good reason (restraining from hurting herself etc) . I didn't witness it but it took a friend of mine a week to tell me and another witness refuses to come forward and is denying it ever happened (both parents of children with special needs). I can't go in to detail of course but I'm in such a state of shock that this has happened and that someone would lie to protect themselves and not give a hoot about my little girl and even their own child in a way as they could have contact with this person.

At the moment it's just an accusation, we have passed everything we know to the head teacher who is taking it very seriously but it has raised some seriously scarey feelings for me in terms of my child's safety and also the amount of abuse they are open to.

My little girl normally loves school but all week has clung to me, not wanting to go and saying she doesn't like the TA in question - now I initially dismissed this, although I wrote into the school to make a note of it and enquire if there was any reason they could think of - which they couldn't. The incident happened a week ago and everything happened at the same time, the not wanting to go to school, not liking this TA and general change in behaviour > being exceptionally clingy to me.My little girl is unable to tell me anything else, she can't communicate what happened and I'm reluctant to use the language in case I implant it as she uses ecolalia ? (sorry for poor spelling) repeating everything basically. 

I feel so helpless, I've had to take her out of school for a 'holiday' while things are done because she is getting distraught and as this TA is in her class I don't want to upset her further.

I just can't believe that in this day and age someone, who is a carer, could turn a blind eye and pretent they never saw it, I also can't believe that someone I thought is my friend is trying to blackmail me into not reporting a safeguarding issue (the other witness is a foster carer and doesn't want to be involved but has a duty of care, and I have a duty too as I run activities and have child protection status with nspcc) - I feel at a complete loss and haven't slept for 2 days.

I have talked to friends, nspcc, school and family and still I feel sick... I don't know what to say to my child and I don't know where to turn now.....

Thanks for reading, any suggestions much appreciated xx

  • im so sorry that you have found yourself in this terrible situation. It is not acceptable in any situation for a member of staff to  grab, push, pull a child or scream in their face. This must be extremley distressing for your child, no wonder she dosnt want to go to school.

    Anyone who witnesses or suspects that somthing like this is happening has a duty to report it, The person you mention to be turning a blind eye to this should be thoroughly ashamed of themself. Social services should probably also be informed that a foster carer is turning a blind eye to potential child abuse.

    Have you looked at your schools child protection policy, the policy should also contain a section on what procedures the school should follow  when an allegation of child abuse is made against a member of staff. I would consider getting a copy of this to ensure they are following these procedures.

    Personally i would also write an official letter of complaint to both the school and the education authority, they will have to write back with an official response,  you have a paper trail then to show you have officialy made them aware of the allegation,.. just in case.

     

     

     

  • So sorry this has happened to your daughter .

    The headteacher should be doing and investigation which should involve getting statements from all those that were there, including the TA. I would contact the school and check this is happening.

    If it is serious the school should involve social care and also posssibly the police. The TA may or may not be suspended during the investigation. The investigation  should assume innocence of the staff memeber but they have to assess the risk - they maybe should have moved her to a different class.

    If not  contact the local authority and they will ensure it happens. EVERYBODY has a duty of care and no-one should turn a blind eye. You need to know what actually happened and if necessary the person needs to be disciplined or retrained.

    Keep talking to the school - you want to get your daughter back there as soon as you can for her routines sake. Talk about what options there are her changing class ot the TA being moved. She will pick up on your worries so try to keep business as ususal were you can.