...what do YOU want to see neurotypicals do in society to help you adapt better , fit in, feel happy etc ?
what changes do YOU think will help do this?
I think you all deserve the chance to speak about this for yourselves rather than other people doing it, so individually and as a group what are changes you think are needed?
some one said:[quote][/quote]
I havnt got a diagnosis. But I wish people would confront me at work if I do something wrong rather than go to someone higher in command, If people go to a superviser I tend to get really frustrated as I dont like sly people.
I wish people would just be truthful. I can't do all of this unspoken stuff.
I wish people would be rational and not hysterical.
Don't space invade.
i understand that, must be frustrating all the 'behind your back' stuff that goes on in neurotypicals lives, frustrates some of us nts too
ahh the 'rational not hysterical' issue,
i have this once a month with my partner (you can guess why us females have hormones you know 
)
i want to say this tho, what autistics seem as 'irrational/hysterical SOMETIMES is just emotional, which i understand as yous dont think very emotional can seem that way, but its not always the case
its difficult for both sides on this, it does feel, from my perspective at least, that as autism leads to more logical and less emotional thinking, emotional thinking that us nts have is often seen as 'irrational, its not, its just different, same as your thinking is
try to take our 'emotional/irational' side for what it is, its just the way we think, same as you think logical , they can clash a lot and i think thats the real problem
neither side is 'wrong' in their thinking
i dont think people mean to invade space, but i have noticed a recent (in the last few years) trend to be more touchy with strangers, hopefully the peopel you know well know to not invade your space but you will probably have to deal with a lot of strangers doing it
tho if you try to make it clear you have autism and basically dont like being touched, they wil probably remember that (tho its obviously tricky as it can lead to them judging you on that, its not an easy issue)
I've learned to deal with touchy feely people (I some times work with Drama lovies (I hate them)) by telling them there touching the wrong part of me. That makes them feel uncomfortable and then the touchy feely stuff goes.
The behind the back thing I still struggle with. Because I'm a grump I make it known to people that if my life is made difficult, I will make others lives difficult, however I have stronger willpower than most. As harsh as this is it avoids a lot of confrontation and I get on with people better for letting it known I won't tolerate.
Emmotional/Irrational stuff is odd. I don't mind people crying or being upset. I think it's people telling me how I feel about stuff I don't like. For instance people saying "you said x and therefore you feel y", and Im more of a x means x and y means y. I'am not very romantic, but that's because I'm not romantic, It doesn't mean I don't love you etc.
My mum does my head in with emotional stuff. She refuses to accept objectivity. She fat and cries if a doctor says she's obese. Where I see obese as a clinical definition of someone who is overweight by a certain proportion.
When/if I get a diagnosis I might start being open with people which might help some of this stuff.
some one said:[quote][/quote]
I havnt got a diagnosis. But I wish people would confront me at work if I do something wrong rather than go to someone higher in command, If people go to a superviser I tend to get really frustrated as I dont like sly people.
I wish people would just be truthful. I can't do all of this unspoken stuff.
I wish people would be rational and not hysterical.
Don't space invade.
i understand that, must be frustrating all the 'behind your back' stuff that goes on in neurotypicals lives, frustrates some of us nts too
ahh the 'rational not hysterical' issue,
i have this once a month with my partner (you can guess why us females have hormones you know )
i want to say this tho, what autistics seem as 'irrational/hysterical SOMETIMES is just emotional, which i understand as yous dont think very emotional can seem that way, but its not always the case
its difficult for both sides on this, it does feel, from my perspective at least, that as autism leads to more logical and less emotional thinking, emotional thinking that us nts have is often seen as 'irrational, its not, its just different, same as your thinking is
try to take our 'emotional/irational' side for what it is, its just the way we think, same as you think logical , they can clash a lot and i think thats the real problem
neither side is 'wrong' in their thinking
i dont think people mean to invade space, but i have noticed a recent (in the last few years) trend to be more touchy with strangers, hopefully the peopel you know well know to not invade your space but you will probably have to deal with a lot of strangers doing it
tho if you try to make it clear you have autism and basically dont like being touched, they wil probably remember that (tho its obviously tricky as it can lead to them judging you on that, its not an easy issue)
I've learned to deal with touchy feely people (I some times work with Drama lovies (I hate them)) by telling them there touching the wrong part of me. That makes them feel uncomfortable and then the touchy feely stuff goes.
The behind the back thing I still struggle with. Because I'm a grump I make it known to people that if my life is made difficult, I will make others lives difficult, however I have stronger willpower than most. As harsh as this is it avoids a lot of confrontation and I get on with people better for letting it known I won't tolerate.
Emmotional/Irrational stuff is odd. I don't mind people crying or being upset. I think it's people telling me how I feel about stuff I don't like. For instance people saying "you said x and therefore you feel y", and Im more of a x means x and y means y. I'am not very romantic, but that's because I'm not romantic, It doesn't mean I don't love you etc.
My mum does my head in with emotional stuff. She refuses to accept objectivity. She fat and cries if a doctor says she's obese. Where I see obese as a clinical definition of someone who is overweight by a certain proportion.
When/if I get a diagnosis I might start being open with people which might help some of this stuff.
