Newly diagnosed 13 year old

Good morning all

This is my first time posting.  I am a mummy of a 13 year old boy who has just (3 days ago) been diagnosed with Aspergers.  Although I have always known there was some kind of diagnosis there, I am in shock a bit and reeling from this.  I have been reading up and there is a lot of stuff around stress during pregnancy being a potential cause.  I was incredibly stressed during my pregnancy with my son.  My mum had dementia and I was dealing with that, supporting my dad, and looking after another son.  Basically during this period my mum was sectioned and put in to a mental home, broke her leg, and I found out my dad was having an affair.  It was an awful time of prolonged stress and now I cant help blaming myself for my son.  I am feeling very guilty and lost. I feel like I have been dropped in to a hole.  I dont know how to best help him, or where to turn.  Sorry my first post is such a negative one.  Just feel a bit lost I guess. 

Parents
  • Please don't blame yourself; they're not completely sure what causes autism but it won't be your 'fault' (if you can call being pregnant and stressed a woman's 'fault' anyway!) AT ALL; I'm not a doctor or a scientist, but from what I understand, there's no science behind the ideas that blame mothers -- frankly, these theories are old-fashioned, sexist rubbish. It sounds like you're a great mum who really cares about her children. I'm also so sorry you've had such a painful time with your family; that's definitely not your fault either. Please take good care of yourself.

Reply
  • Please don't blame yourself; they're not completely sure what causes autism but it won't be your 'fault' (if you can call being pregnant and stressed a woman's 'fault' anyway!) AT ALL; I'm not a doctor or a scientist, but from what I understand, there's no science behind the ideas that blame mothers -- frankly, these theories are old-fashioned, sexist rubbish. It sounds like you're a great mum who really cares about her children. I'm also so sorry you've had such a painful time with your family; that's definitely not your fault either. Please take good care of yourself.

Children
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