Long term pen pals :D

You have got some fascinating interests and I am sure you will get replies from people who share these. It is wonderful that you have some of your work on deviantART already and that you are looking into Redbubbke too.

Have you ever used Twitter? I follow quite a few people who tweet about nature photography and related subjects. 

I was intrigued by your name so I looked it up and discovered it Is the term for a code of ethics or virtues for Samurai warriors (hope I've got that right!). 

Have you seen this page on the NAS website? There is another way of finding Pen Pals via a magazine which you might want to try too: https://www.autism.org.uk/about/adult-life/resources/the-spectrum/penpals.aspx

The Spectrum is the new name for the magazine formerly known as Asperger United. 

There are some lovely people in this community. I'm sure you will find suitable pen pals. 

Hi Sunflower

Thank you for your response, :).

Thank you for your compliments regarding my interests, :). I’m just hoping that somehow, someone will be able to share a common ground with me to hopefully start off the social experience with a head start. I’m keen to write to someone who can either share an interest with me, or even to share similar experiences, such as the horrors of the school system. Certain experiences from our school lives can really open your eyes up to the people, neurotypical or otherwise, you’d likely meet. I see life as a kind of minefield, with a holy grail on the other side, it’s very difficult to make for the goal, when there are so many difficulties and obstacles in your way, >.<. I wanted to try to set out a gambit out there on this forum for example, to see if it could allow me to come closer to my goal, to build long lasting, meaningful and trustworthy relations.

It’s interesting you should mention Twitter, and yes, I’ve been on Twitter myself. I found it difficult at first due to the confined spaces of writing, >.<. However; eventually I began to build my own way of using Twitter, re-tweeting, making separate part comments, to allow accommodate more writing space, -_-. Still, I have not had a pleasant experience on Twitter, because it’s all very well talking about nature photography and related subject, but when you start voicing your views, it’s not long before you face an aggressive, abusive twitter user, -_-. This is the difficulty I have with the internet, but the alternative is even worse, so, in speculation, all I can do is keep trying I suppose. My trust in social networking has had quite a harsh effect on me so far. Even to the point where Facebook has a lot of users from my torturous school days, :(. Needless to say, I don’t wish to find them writing to me on there.

Yes, you are correct, Bushidō (or Bu-shi-do-u) is the phonetic pronunciation of Japanese symbols for the term, ‘The Way of the Samurai’. Basically, I’m using that name as a way of tying in my interest in Japan, much like China, in a way, due to my knowledge of their histories, as well as the modern Japanese entertainment basically. Due to my interest in anime (Japanese animation), I conjointly have an interest in modern Japanese music as well, musicians such as Yui, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5Tu7NXEn7M , Aqua Timez, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6BtEHFxvlE , and UNLIMITS, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDQMIrI_5Z0 , to name a few.

Truth be told, I have posted a pen pal advert within the Asperger’s United in the past, before they changed their name. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the success I’d hoped for, -_-. I had to wait along time before my advert appeared in the magazine. Also, there wasn’t much space to write your interests, and how could I describe my interests and my difficulties in such a small writing space? I feel, the more you explain, the better the chance someone may be able to relate to you. I tried writing to someone who wrote a letter to me, who enjoyed playing video games like I do, however; the correspondence didn’t last long, >.<;. This persons stated that they were only using the pen pal service for a writing course, when I needed someone long term to write to, not temporary, and certainly not just for a written course, -_-;. I enjoyed writing to this person at first, it was interesting, but before long, I started to notice sharp differences between our lifestyles, such that this person came from a privileged background, so I could recognise the difference between our access to aid which would have been off limits to someone like me, -_-. I quickly began to see how different our viewpoints on life were, because they didn’t see life from same vantage point as me, :(. I could quickly see that it was becoming increasingly uncomfortable, because it was quite surreal considering how well off they were, such as owning acres of land, -_-. When you can’t see eye to eye, it makes conversation very difficult. Needless to say, within a couple of letters, I never received a reply again from this person, which is shame because this person was the only one which came close to my own interests, :(. Maybe this person began to realise how different our lives really were, -_-.

I decided to retry, this time on the forum, therefore I felt I’d have more of a chance on expanding on my interests some more, not to mention, my conditions, difficulties, experiences, etc., to hopefully give the reader a better chance of finding something they could relate to, or at that’s my hope, >.<;.

Thank you for your support, :), it’s good to read your kind words, you may be surprised how rare they can be these days across the internet, -_-;.

Hi I am a mum of a 22 year old son diagnosed with Asperger ,just like you I have experienced horrors with school system ,although in juniors teachers were aware my son had Aspergers he had a teacher who ridiculed him in class calling him names slow ,lazy ,stupid etc as a result of this my son was bullied had no friends ,when I found out I pulled my son out of school and reported teacher ,nothing was done ,I was told my son was unreachable and was told he had to go to unit each day for autistic children ,I refused and was then threatened with court action ,I got my boy into a church school. Which I had to pay for I promptly got 2nd job he stayed there till he was 16 ,had lots friends and did well ,learned to play guitar and came home smiling every day as every child should ,he is now 22,working full time ,and getting engaged in April and busy saving for house ,there is not enough support out there at all ,although I’m only mum of child with autism .i would say keep pursuing your interests ,there are decent lovely people out there who will write support you ,keep going ,I hope things improve for you and hope future smiles on you

Personally, I don’t know what experiences your son has had, apart from, as you said, he was bullied at school, as I have, but by both students and teachers, to be honest, I have a difficulty with the evaluation that there are 'lovely people out there', which maybe so, though finding them is the hardest challenge of them all, particularly of the female persuasion. I’ve been through so many traumatic experiences in the social world, over and over again, ever since I first set foot in the school playground and it just keeps getting worse, year by year. For decades now I am totally alienated from my peer group because I have no idea who I can and cannot trust. There is far too much evil out there.

First of all, I’ve said it before, that I went through a traumatic breakdown at secondary school, the effects of which have not lessened, but expanded over time. This includes trauma which authority figures caused me because of what I’d been through, and led to me being taught from behind my bedroom door for five and half years, following a statement of special education needs my mother fought for me to have. This ended prematurely when I reached 19 years of age, when I should have been entitled up till I was 25. The local authority did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to help me, all they did was make everything worse. They told lie upon lie at my biannual review meetings my mother attended, supposedly for support for me, but they couldn’t have cared less!!! I am now 27, feeling trapped, alienated and lonely. I have no trust in the world around me, it’s caused me far too much trauma. I need to find a way to socialise with like-minded people. I need to be able to write to a female and get to know her, to build a rapport, because, unlike your son, I am unable to work. I need to find a social safety barrier and foundation before I can become strong enough to take on my future. I need social strength from a female who will stand by my side, so that I can feel empowered enough to help support us both when the time comes. I know of the power of a strong and true bond with a female, because I came close, however; this was part of my traumas, because you see, she was autistic herself, and she did not understand romantic relationships. She meant a great deal to me, I sent her so many handmade gifts, I wrote so many affectionate words to her, I grew feelings for her, when I met her for the first and only time, she gave me a brief feeling of empowerment which was like the holy grail for me. However; she didn’t want to know, and so, instead of understanding how I felt, she decided to aggressively attack me instead, pushing me away completely and calling me a lying, saying that I didn’t care about her, but I did, very much so, but she just didn’t want to understand the reasons why. I decided to post this ‘long term pen pal’ request because I knew it would be impossible for me to socialise in the outside world generally speaking, so I needed to find a way to socialise across the internet. I just thought there’d be some female on the autistic spectrum willing to write to me just as the autistic female wrote to me before, but without the aggressiveness which has left me with greater emotional pain than I had to begin with.

You see, these days I’ve taken to losing myself in online games such as Elder Scrolls Online, because between a fantasy video gaming world, and the hostile world out there, I know where I’d feel the safest. I’m losing hope you see. I just can’t socialise in the outside world like other people, I have an enormous amount of social anxiety that I’d need to write for long enough to get to know a female.

The people out there are wolves in sheep’s clothing, you don’t know who you can and cannot trust, that’s why it’s important to get to know each other first. I can’t just ‘go out there’ and expect the outside world to understand both me and my difficulties, it’s not gonna work! I’d have had a better chance walking through fire than getting anywhere out in THAT chaos! It might be alright for some of us, but not all of us are strong enough… This world can be a cruel and harsh place to live, especially when you have my difficulties. Honestly, for your son to be able to cope with work is in itself a strength I know I’ll never possess, especially in a HOSTILE and CORRUPT world such as this one. I wish him my best, but my difficulties are so great that so many avenues are cut off from me. I need to socialise and get to know a female FIRST, before I have the power to face the world around me, otherwise, it’s not going to work, no matter how strong everyone else maybe. I’m not like them; I’m not strong enough on my own.

Personally, I don’t know what experiences your son has had, apart from, as you said, he was bullied at school, as I have, but by both students and teachers, to be honest, I have a difficulty with the evaluation that there are 'lovely people out there', which maybe so, though finding them is the hardest challenge of them all, particularly of the female persuasion. I’ve been through so many traumatic experiences in the social world, over and over again, ever since I first set foot in the school playground and it just keeps getting worse, year by year. For decades now I am totally alienated from my peer group because I have no idea who I can and cannot trust. There is far too much evil out there.

First of all, I’ve said it before, that I went through a traumatic breakdown at secondary school, the effects of which have not lessened, but expanded over time. This includes trauma which authority figures caused me because of what I’d been through, and led to me being taught from behind my bedroom door for five and half years, following a statement of special education needs my mother fought for me to have. This ended prematurely when I reached 19 years of age, when I should have been entitled up till I was 25. The local authority did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to help me, all they did was make everything worse. They told lie upon lie at my biannual review meetings my mother attended, supposedly for support for me, but they couldn’t have cared less!!! I am now 27, feeling trapped, alienated and lonely. I have no trust in the world around me, it’s caused me far too much trauma. I need to find a way to socialise with like-minded people. I need to be able to write to a female and get to know her, to build a rapport, because, unlike your son, I am unable to work. I need to find a social safety barrier and foundation before I can become strong enough to take on my future. I need social strength from a female who will stand by my side, so that I can feel empowered enough to help support us both when the time comes. I know of the power of a strong and true bond with a female, because I came close, however; this was part of my traumas, because you see, she was autistic herself, and she did not understand romantic relationships. She meant a great deal to me, I sent her so many handmade gifts, I wrote so many affectionate words to her, I grew feelings for her, when I met her for the first and only time, she gave me a brief feeling of empowerment which was like the holy grail for me. However; she didn’t want to know, and so, instead of understanding how I felt, she decided to aggressively attack me instead, pushing me away completely and calling me a lying, saying that I didn’t care about her, but I did, very much so, but she just didn’t want to understand the reasons why. I decided to post this ‘long term pen pal’ request because I knew it would be impossible for me to socialise in the outside world generally speaking, so I needed to find a way to socialise across the internet. I just thought there’d be some female on the autistic spectrum willing to write to me just as the autistic female wrote to me before, but without the aggressiveness which has left me with greater emotional pain than I had to begin with.

You see, these days I’ve taken to losing myself in online games such as Elder Scrolls Online, because between a fantasy video gaming world, and the hostile world out there, I know where I’d feel the safest. I’m losing hope you see. I just can’t socialise in the outside world like other people, I have an enormous amount of social anxiety that I’d need to write for long enough to get to know a female.

The people out there are wolves in sheep’s clothing, you don’t know who you can and cannot trust, that’s why it’s important to get to know each other first. I can’t just ‘go out there’ and expect the outside world to understand both me and my difficulties, it’s not gonna work! I’d have had a better chance walking through fire than getting anywhere out in THAT chaos! It might be alright for some of us, but not all of us are strong enough… This world can be a cruel and harsh place to live, especially when you have my difficulties. Honestly, for your son to be able to cope with work is in itself a strength I know I’ll never possess, especially in a HOSTILE and CORRUPT world such as this one. I wish him my best, but my difficulties are so great that so many avenues are cut off from me. I need to socialise and get to know a female FIRST, before I have the power to face the world around me, otherwise, it’s not going to work, no matter how strong everyone else maybe. I’m not like them; I’m not strong enough on my own.