Anhedonia

TheCatWoman said:

One of the problems is that GP's have so little time and training and of course resourses.

A valid point, definitely.

I've had periods of what I called 'malaise', which is not as deep as depression [I've endured that too] but a kind of apathy which pervades everything. These followed traumas like divorce and bullying at work. What boosted me were changes in lifestyle, like taking up campaigning and writing; things that challenged me and helped others too [an important part of feeling good about yourself.] Perhaps being at home alone too much is not good for your psyche, as you are used to working with others [even if that is stressful]. Are you a cause or campaign person? Having something new to focus on, that you really believe in, might help. Also, try this website and see if it chimes - 5 Ways to Wellbeing. Best wishes and keep posting on this community.

Is any health care system completely trustworthy?

I think that many healthcare systems struggle with depression and other mental health problems and of course autism. One of the problems is that GP's have so little time and training and of course resourses.

Maybe you could try some alternative practitioners? Maybe a medical herbalist, acupuncture or reflexology might help where traditional western medicines have failed?

I'm very sorry, that you are going through such a tough time. I remember some similar period in my past, I think it was due to exhaustion. I had no energy even for my favourite activities. It happens to me, when there is too much going on around. 

I'm sorry, I wish I couldhelp you, but I can't give you anything more than just few words to support you. I think you need a professional help. Please take care! 

I've considered going back to the doctor, but it's the same old prescribe SSRIs and hope for the best routine that's never helped in the past.

Strangely, working out is one of the few things I really look forward to. Even if I can't be bothered working out, I know I'll feel good afterwards. I do Muay Thai twice a week in addition to weight training and would love to incorporate some football in if possible.

It really does help since a lot of hobbies are lonely passions. I did have a long term friend who I was helping with their guitar journey, but we lost touch over time unfortunately.

Thank you for the response!

NotLikeThemButICanPretend said:

My work has never been easier since I went remote, but there is definitely something missing and I would like to do hybrid work if possible.

That is a definitely a possibility that remote work could be a contributor. I mean, I personally would prefer hybrid over remote (especially since with my ADHD I fear that I would get nothing done when working from home lol), so I can certainly understand how changing to hybrid could benefit you.

NotLikeThemButICanPretend said:

I don't like to rock the boat too much since I get a decent salary for relatively easy work, but I don't think being stuck at home most of the time is good for you.

Of course I don’t know who you work for, but I would wager that it wouldn’t hurt to at least pose the question if hybrid is a possibility. Obviously office space could be an issue depending on the employer, but I can’t imagine it would hurt your position to ask.

NotLikeThemButICanPretend said:

I've tried numerous different SSRIs over the years to no avail and the withdrawals is something I don't want to experience again since they don't taper property on the NHS.

That’s fair. I recently tapered off an antidepressant under a psychiatrist, but he essentially left it up to me to determine how long the process should take. I can understand that processes for that sort of thing are likely handled differently over there, and judging by what others have said on this forum I get the feeling the NHS isn’t completely trustworthy. 

There is definitely an element of depression there, which has always been present in some form since early adulthood. I've tried numerous different SSRIs over the years to no avail and the withdrawals is something I don't want to experience again since they don't taper properly on the NHS.

My work has never been easier since I went remote, but there is definitely something missing and I would like to do hybrid work if possible. I don't like to rock the boat too much since I get a decent salary for relatively easy work, but I don't think being stuck at home most of the time is good for you.

Working out is one of the few times I actually feel good and accomplished. I strangely look forward to it.

Your response is much appreciated!

I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling with this for so long.

I suggest seeking support from your GP. Alongside that, you might find these resources helpful:

NAS - Depression

NAS - Autistic fatigue and burnout

NAS - Seeking help with mental health

Good morning from America, NotLikeThemButICanPretend!

NOTE: I am not an expert on the subject whatsoever. Anything I say on the subject is unprofessional opinion based on general observations. I’m a former music teacher, not a doctor.

From what I’ve seen, anhedonia could be an effect of Autism, depression, or very likely both. In regards to Autism, it is possible to suffer through Autistic burnout, which can impact several areas of life including enjoyment and energy to do things, much like a major depressive episode. That seems to usually be caused by immense stimulation - such as a demanding job or a stressful situation - and can last from months to a few years.

However, given the fact that you have felt this way for 3-4 years, that makes me feel as though this is likely more connected to depression than Autism. I’d highly recommend talking with a doctor specifically about the length of time you have experienced anhedonia. If you are already on antidepressants, it may be a good idea to consider an adjustment to see if a different dosage or drug would possibly help get you to a more manageable baseline.

Now, I do want to say that your account sounds far from being all “doom and gloom.” The fact that you have enough energy to work out at the gym is amazing and a great sign that things can change for the better, as I feel as though most people in your situation would struggle immensely with physical activity (which makes the burnout and/or depression even worse). My advice in that regard is to be careful not to work yourself out so hard that you push yourself past exhaustion. Your physical health is even more important when you are struggling emotionally.

I’m wishing you the best!

Hello NotLikeThemButICanPretend,

I am really sorry to hear this. It can be very difficult when the joy disappears from something we once loved. Other members may be able to offer their own stories or support. We cannot (as per our rules) offer any specific medical advice but I would suggest monitoring these feelings and if you become more concerned please do speak to your doctor about it. 

I am interested in that fact that you are able to motivate yourself to go the gym. This is great - as that physical release will be very beneficial. I wonder whether there are any new sports or physical activities you would be prepared to try which may help you find the joy again?

Another idea - would sharing your other hobbies (if you would like to) on this forum help? You may find someone who also has the same hobby or is interested in learning more which could spark your interest again. 

With very best wishes, 

Anna Mod