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Extreme anxiety due to silence of girlfriend, sertraline

hypercolius

It's now been over 6 months since me and SG became close. 

I remember I was writing things like this back in April, that she's silent, she's gone, she won't ever text. 

A while back, I found out the exact text of the complaint some people in my university made against me. It contributed to a feeling of depression and hopelessness right now. 

Me and SG spent 10 hours together on the 9th June and last week we were booking a road trip together, lasting 4 days, and she spent almost £200 on it that day. She promised to call me this weekend whilst saying the past one she was too busy. 

But she's silent now. Going online, but silent. Last time she wrote was just half an hour after I spiralled so badly that I took diazepam to calm down. 

Last week, she was texting less but was asking me so many questions and saying things like 'You'll have to tell me all about it!'

I texted her this morning when her internship (9am-5pm) began but no response. 

Maybe it's the sertraline messing with my head (2 days in), but I just wanted to be reassured. Would someone ever spend money on me, write me beautiful texts, promise to help me move my stuff from university and say yes to a call, ever just go silent forever?

Parents

  • She's booked a trip with you. Why would she waste £200 if she was going to disappear?

    If she has promised to help, why don't you believe her?

    Maybe be she is busy and doesn't think she needs to call or contact you so often. She will be in touch.

    Maybe it is a test to see if you are ok for a few days and can manage on your own.

    Perhaps you need to talk to her about communicating next time so you understand.

  • in reply to Stuart333

    She knows I spiral. Said she felt bad about not replying immediately. She also said she wanted me to text as much as I liked. 

    She doesn't know of the catastrophic spirals I've been having now, though. I hide these things from her because I don't want her to be upset. 

Reply Children
  • in reply to hypercolius

    You need to think of the text messages like old fashioned letters where you put a stamp on, sent it and waited. It could take a day to get there, them some time for them to write, then a day to get back.

    Instant messages are convenient, but also bad.

    Limit yourself to looking at the messages a couple of times a day. Think of sending one like a letter. Don't expect an answer back for a day or more.

    Do something else during the day, read, go out, watch a movie. Don't look at the phone.

    People get addicted to them and get worried if they don't get a quick response. If you can break the habit, you will feel more free and less anxious.

    The phone is a tool to help you, you are not a slave to it.

    You have to trust her.