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Stepping back from social media

Neuroqueer

A few months ago I left mainstream socials. I closed down my 2 Instagram accounts (personal and work) and shut down my Threads and Facebook. I also stopped using Reddit and Bluesky. When Threads first started a bit over a year ago it was a very wholesome experience but it wasn't long before we started getting an influx of trolls and bigots from X (Twitter) and despite people trying to ignore them, people naturally couldn't help responding when they were personally attacked or offended. 

I joined Bluesky as it attracted a more diverse crowd and even though it was mostly Americans it was still better than being unable to post about your day without some troll telling you were doing it wrong and you were too fat, thin, ugly or stupid to do it anyway. People can be awful online. The safety of being behind a screen gives some people way too much confidence which seems to bypass their empathy. However, when the election happened Bluesky became even more about US politics, and being a queer man and a feminist I found that it was severely affecting my mental health having to see all the negative ugliness every day.

The warning "Don't read the comments' is so valid if you want to retain your happiness on social media. It can be so awful, and even when my sense of injustice was triggered and I responded, the abuse or worry of abuse and what it would do to my RSD wasn't worth the effort. Upsetting people seems to be a badge of honour to some.

I like to be aware of what's going on in the world, but not at the expense of my own peace, so for now I'm keeping away from it to preserve my sanity over the next 4 years while that lot try to take over the world with cruelty and lies, and get laughed at by every other country. I know we have problems here too, but I'm keeping out of that too. Someone else can carry the torch for a bit. It's also the reason I've not joined in on the political thread here. Some of the 'theories' on there are concerning. 

  • I quit most social media about 14 years ago.

    I kept a reddit account which never seemed as bad. I was typically subscribed to tech stuff or sources for funny content. Always felt like there was a lot less attention-seeking there as it's mostly anonymous. I also had twitter as it seemed like the only way to get some companies to act sometimes, but rarely used it.

    I left reddit when they shut down the app I was using. Thier official app was terrible ans I'm not sifting through that many ads to find the content I want.

    I'm on youtube, but again, mostly subscribed to specific channels for tech and educational content. I use an ad blocker because it feels like the only sane way to view it now, and the volume is increased for the ads. 

    I've only just signed to to facebook again, but I have 0 friends and plan to keep it that way. I only signed up because there's a community that uses it exclusively, and neurodivergent adults is quite amusing.

    I like the balance I've got. Especially as there's so much information about how clickbait works now. There is so much of it which is designed to aggravate you so that you'll interact. Even things like gramatical mistakes in titles so that you'll comment with a correction. It's awful.

  • in reply to 190E(Taylor’s version)

    I don't have any social media and I get on OK, it is annoying not to have it at times when people tell me all their stuff is on facebook. To me the hassle outweighs any convienience

  • Sadly to get anywhere in the modern world tou need social media but im hoping eventually moderation will be the key becuase the all or nothing approach ive had so far works in one aspect but not another 

  • in reply to Meguanz

    Same for me. Hard to put into words how much I've tried to be open minded to just be told things like "surely you dont want to change your mind, you are a bad person etc."

    I almost exclusively read blogs now, through feed readers.

  • It takes a lot to recognise when something is damaging your peace and actually step away from it. Socials have become a minefield, especially for anyone who isn’t part of the majority or willing to stay silent. It’s not about hiding, it’s about protecting your energy

  • That's why I stopped spending time on Facebook and Instagram. When you read the comments some people make, no matter the subject of the post, you realise how much ugliness there is out there. It makes me sad. Now I just use social media to communicate with my close friends, check their photos, etc, and for work. I don't engage in anything else in there!

    This forum here seems very different. Although I am a new member, I see why people on Reddit were suggesting it. I think that the strict policy about what you can or can't express here protects the members from people who want to spread hatred. It may feel like you can't fully express your self sometimes, but I believe it's for the better. It keeps things smooth (if I got it right, being a newbie face with monocle).

  • I've never done social media, not really, I've never done fb and x and I'm not sure i've ever heard of some of the others you mentioned, but the lack of privacy and the trolling that I've heard others complain of give me no incentive to try and find out more, let alone join them.