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Struggling

Cre8tiveDaniel


Hello,

The feeling of being misunderstood as someone with autism by society has resurfaced affecting my mood. I was reading some benefits letters which brought up an unanswered query, triggering the following negative thoughts. The situation made me imagine that my support worker would be telling me not to be afraid to contact the benefits about any information I do not understand. I was thinking he would be asking me about how my benefits is worked out and I had to explain it. I was saying to an imaginary person that it is like roles are reversed because he should be giving me information. The made up person was expressing how that was not right.

I have took the time to challenge my thoughts and recognise that they are not accurate. However, I felt expected to comprehend the information when autistic individuals process information differently and struggle to process it particularly when it is complex. I have had experiences where I have felt that way and it made me feel misunderstood and isolated which have been painful to feel. I am aware of my strengths but I want to focus on how I am feeling.

I am not comfortable in talking to him directly because he went straight to reassurance instead of taking the time to understand how I felt when I have shared a situation with him.

Considering to share my experience brought up a memory where a member on here focussed on the other person’s intention and applied logic to my feelings. He offered solutions when I never asked for them, which made me feel invalidated. I did share this at the time but he did not acknowledge it.

 

Parents

  • It looks as if you may be using a personalised profile picture here, so I'd draw your attention to the rules.  

    Rule 2: No personal information and identifiable content. The Online Community is public, so please do not share personal or identifying details about yourself or anyone else. This rule protects everyone’s privacy and safety. Do not share full names, addresses, contact details, social media profiles or photos that can identify you or others. You may share links to social media posts or videos if they are relevant, helpful or interesting and comply with these rules. Please ensure the content does not identify its creator unless they are a public figure.

    Cre8tiveDaniel said:
    Considering to share my experience brought up a memory where a member on here focussed on the other person’s intention and applied logic to my feelings. He offered solutions when I never asked for them, which made me feel invalidated. I did share this at the time but he did not acknowledge it

    I don't know about the occasion to which you refer, but when you bring your experiences to a public forum it is the case that people may respond in a manner that is not to our liking.  Everyone here acts in a voluntary capacity, and uses their experience for the good of the community according to the rules of the forum.  If you present issues here, many will regard them as problems to be solved, so perhaps that is something to bear in mind, going forward. 

Reply

  • It looks as if you may be using a personalised profile picture here, so I'd draw your attention to the rules.  

    Rule 2: No personal information and identifiable content. The Online Community is public, so please do not share personal or identifying details about yourself or anyone else. This rule protects everyone’s privacy and safety. Do not share full names, addresses, contact details, social media profiles or photos that can identify you or others. You may share links to social media posts or videos if they are relevant, helpful or interesting and comply with these rules. Please ensure the content does not identify its creator unless they are a public figure.

    Cre8tiveDaniel said:
    Considering to share my experience brought up a memory where a member on here focussed on the other person’s intention and applied logic to my feelings. He offered solutions when I never asked for them, which made me feel invalidated. I did share this at the time but he did not acknowledge it

    I don't know about the occasion to which you refer, but when you bring your experiences to a public forum it is the case that people may respond in a manner that is not to our liking.  Everyone here acts in a voluntary capacity, and uses their experience for the good of the community according to the rules of the forum.  If you present issues here, many will regard them as problems to be solved, so perhaps that is something to bear in mind, going forward. 

Children
  • in reply to overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U )

    Hello  

    I appreciate you reaching out. Thank you for reminding me about the rules. I removed my personalised profile picture and my location from my profile.

    I understand. Others will naturally offer solutions when we share issues because they usually want to help, but it can sometimes land with us differently, especially in writing. However, responses can still upset me regardless of their desire to problem solve. Especially when the impact of my experience was not fully acknowledged. I will try though to bear in mind that many will offer solutions.