Feel like I'm a outlier. Somewhat apart from the rest of you. I regularly check for new posts, but feel unable to contribute.
Feel like I'm a outlier. Somewhat apart from the rest of you. I regularly check for new posts, but feel unable to contribute.
You can? Not to me you haven't. But I suspect that most people have the 'clod hopping twat' part of themselves as well as the 'people pleaser' part. I guess it's part of being a mostly social species, we want to get through life with the minimum amount of hassle by pleasing others, but also suffer from foot in mouth disease, often quite unintentionally.
I can be a total, clod hopping, twat at times which runs contrary to the bullying related trauma fuelled 'people pleaser' part of me.
No I don't think you do, but just be aware that not everyone knows what the acronyms mean. You've been one of my favourite posters and I miss your conributions.
It's not masking, but do I need to be less than the person I truly am in order not to alienate/irritate people here?
but in my experience it's better to keep ones political views to oneself on the internet.
Yes, I have quite strong political beliefs, but don't go out of my way to bombard people with my political views.
I don't get all the acronyms either, thanks for the explaination fm, but to be honest I won't remember them from thread to thread and will skip over thread and posts that are full of them as I can't understand them and get a bit irritated.
I have no idea what SMI, DCD, 2e, FBPE, WGD and Calne are.
SMI= serious/severe mental illness, DCD= dyspraxia , 2e= twice exceptional, FBPE= Follow back pro European union,WGD= World genius directory(the title is OTT), Calne= town in Wiltshire.
Hey, firemonkey! Let me just say: That is an example of a super interesting text you just posted. There are plenty of interesting aspects in there and I would love to hear more about your interests, sounds like you’ve got some thrilling knowledge and opinions about them. This thread alone is already fascinating. It lead to some interesting questions like “How do you define success?”, “Is there a set type of outlier?” and topics like subconscious self-censoring.
So maybe you don’t have to worry about not being “interesting” enough or something like that.
Thank you. The DNA part is to do with so called cousin matches. The more I share with a person,the closer I'm likely to be related to them.
There are free courses in the Open University website about DNA, at various levels and course lengths, if you are interested, such as this one:
Interests wise = genealogy inc DNA, politics,quizzes and tests, reaction time as a measure of intelligence, mental health/illness. Social media wise I use Facebook, X, and Blue Sky. Blue Sky more than X now. The IQ thing is very mixed in my mind . On one hand craving for more tests to try, on the other hand increasingly cynical about the results. I got involved with the high IQ community via a Facebook group linked to the IQ exams website. The website is no longer available, but the Facebook group is. There are sites where you can post your high scores. It's somewhat narcissistic, truth be told, but no more so than good looking people posting photos of themselves.
If there's a God, he's got a twisted/warped sense of humour re my interest in genealogy. It's an interest/hobby that requires good organising and planning ability, and mine suck(to put it mildly) . I'm waiting for the results of research being done on my surname. I'd thought my surname ancestors were Anglican/Protestant , but my 3gt and his brothers were baptised Catholic.
As A said, we're all "outliers" here. We all have different experiences, and to me it's interesting to hear the different views and experiences of others.
I've read through this thread and it seems that part of the reason you feel different is because you didn't go to university and have been long term unemployed. But lots of autistic people are in that situation. I didn't go to university either, and although I did work for many years I'm glad to be retired now and not working - it wasn't much fun.
it can get a bit "samey" on here sometimes, but that's because new people discover the forum and have the same or similar questions about diagnosis, support, how to unmask, etc. But sometimes we start threads for fun, like the music quiz that Debbie started, or the cat one with the slightly rude sounding title, or the "3 good things". You can start a conversation about anything - it doesn't have to be autism related.
What are your interests? I looked at your profile and to be honest I didn't understand some of the things you put on there. I have no idea what SMI, DCD, 2e, FBPE, WGD and Calne are. There are also some things on there related to politics - if you feel strongly these are things that you identify with that's fine, but in my experience it's better to keep ones political views to oneself on the internet. I hope you don't mind me saying that - I'm honestly trying to be supportive and helpful.
You mention that your life is a bit "groundhog day". So what do you spend your time doing? Is there anything you'd like to do, or find out more about? I love reading and can do a lot more of it now I've retired, and I'm interested in lots of different subjects and have done some free online courses.
I think that sometimes people feel that what they have to say will not be interesting to others, but if you try to start a thread about something you are interested in or have been thinking about I'm sure others will.join in, and hopefully you'll find things in common and feel more of a connection.
Never give up!
It's not a goal that you should strive for, maybe? Censoring yourself for not being interesting enough is not the way to look at it maybe?
I think Number is right - just talk on other threads and don't TRY to be interesting.
I'm not interesting. I'm as boring as hell. I've been told I'm as boring as hell once or twice. I no longer care.
There is no need to impress anyone here.
I generally find neurodivergent people, in particular those who are autistic to be very forgiving people. This is the majority of us here. You are doing just fine. Everyone is. Sometimes we require clear feedback to understand we are doing ok as we may not intuitively know. IRL it's perfectly fine to sit on the sidelines and listen, here is different as presence isn't known unless one is productive....but the same principle applies. The way members communicate on here is a bit limited due to the platform. If we could do mood boards, mind-maps, hand drawn notes etc rather than lines of text, this would free up the ways in which communicate. I don't have answers and apologies if I've missed the mark.
Try us with something. What interests you the most? What are you interested in? You have talked about IQ and your presence in other chat-like-places before.......how do you find them?
No need to answer if you'd prefer not to.....but sometimes just "slinging some words" out into the ether can yield unexpected results. I've been prompted down many interesting knowledge holes of mine, prompted by people here.
It's less a case of 'not feeling like' than of struggling to think of interesting and worthwhile things to say.
No need to back out. As my daughter would say 'no problem'
I've lived in places like that. Sometimes it can be years before they notice the cat flap...
Cat's legally are not defined as pets, they are technically classed as free spirits that can and will go where they like.
But yeah, landlords have the whip edge right now it seems, so probably best not to.actually get a cat.
If you are on the ground floor though just fit a cat flap, buy a bag of dreamies, and wait to be "adopted"... Some cats "owners" lock them out of the house during the day or night, often such cats live in two houses...
I get that outlier feeling, though. I can understand why some people quit the forum too.It's a bit like a mirror at times.
Thank you so much, I really appreciate that!
I think that we all feel this in some respect, firemonkey. It is good to know that you are around even if you don't feel like contributing much.