Published on 12, July, 2020
If I am going to learn how to manage my autism symptoms, then I've decided that I don't want to be in any neurotypical environment anymore - I find neurotypical environments to be too toxic. Watching my sisters and their friends have children of their own is an extremely sad reminder of my mental condition, and I feel that I am unable to be around my parents anymore let alone continue living with them because of the burden that comes with caring for someone with special needs. I am considering living in a suitable autism-friendly environment where I will be spending all day in sensory gardens as a means of permanent respite; focusing on having access to all types of sensory therapies is for the best. The plan for the near future is to start seeing a professional psychiatrist and start looking at being provided with holistic support from the special needs therapeutic educational charities and therapeutic intervention services that I am looking into at the moment. When I start being provided with a special needs mental health team, they need to treat me like an adult but at the same time be capable of cognitive empathy rather than have unrealistic expectations that I will only end up struggling to meet. I will continue self-injuring and hitting myself in the head in frustration, I will continue physically hurting myself and suffering from severe depression and having thoughts of suicide because of the torture that comes with being on the autism spectrum - I have no choice but to learn to live with these demons. People die by suicide every day. Society needs to stop looking at suicide as something considered taboo.
eh?first of all society needs to stop glamorising and making suicide seem edgy and cool especially targeted to kids. if anything it needs to be taboo again, and lame and cringe.a alternative to hurting yourself in a negative way.... would be hurting yourself in a positive way such as weight lifting.consider weight lifting to be self torture, self inflicted pain... also it can symbolise bearing the weight of burden, the weight of the world upon your shoulders.... lift weights, torture yourself through the pain and burden of weight lifting... your body will grow big and strong, you will gain a new sense of living through it and be changed. it still classes as self harm in your mind, everytime you feel bad and want to self harm hit the weights, bear that weight of the world, pick up that burden and lift. get swole, get ripped, then anything is possible and no burden is too heavy for you.
be the promethean ubermensch!!