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Frustrated with myself

Sporadic Sparkly

Currently, I am feeling seriously p*ssed off and frustrated with myself. It had been arranged on Monday that my son would accompany me to a dental appointment this morning. Not to have anything done, but to have a discussion with the dentist as to whether I require another course of antibiotics (I finished my last lot of antibiotics yesterday).

This morning, I was not amused when my son asked me if I would be okay to get to the appointment by myself. It is something that I would have been perfectly capable of 5+ years ago, but the prospect of venturing further than my local shop, on my own, now causes me immense anxiety.

As a result, I ended up having to cancel the appointment that I would now be on my way to. Fortunately, it's been rebooked for next week.

I feel so flipping frustrated with myself, but also somewhat frustrated with my son. I don't think he slept well last night because of the heat, but he wasn't the only one. I just wish I could turn the clock back to a time in my life when I had more confidence and wasn't so dependent on my son. 

Parents

  • Ah Sparkly I feel your frustrations. Five years ago I was so independent, I was anxious with it but I could go out and didn't need much support from anybody. Five years later and now I don't go out on my own, I need constant support and assistance.

    I feel frustrated on the days when I can't go out.
    But you know what? It's ok....it's ok to need support and not be able to do some things. When you start feeling negative that you didn't do something one day think back to the last day you DID do something. It's easy to focus on the negatives and when you do....the positives slip silently by.
    I think that's a good idea by autonomistic going by yourself to the dentist and seeing how you feel, on a Sunday perhaps when it will be quieter? 
    I'm not sure if it's possible for you but have you thought of getting a dog......they make great friends and offer protection and comfort when you are out. If it's well trained enough then you can take them in to some places like dentists under medical grounds.....just a suggestion for you to consider.
    Please don't be too hard on yourself today.
    Best wishes,
    Noob King.
  • in reply to Mister

    I think it’s very good advice to suggest that you be forgiving of yourself and your son. I’m not sure how old your son is or what his situation is? I think a lot of us lose confidence at various points in our lives (I know I have). The pandemic has had a big impact on mine and my sons confidence levels and our ability to face things and do things. Eg this week we had to go to IKEA (which none of us like) - I drove us there but when we got there neither I or my son could face going in as it was so crowded and awful - so my husband went in to get what we needed while we stayed outside. We just couldn’t face it. But I don’t blame us for that - we struggle with I push large places like that. 4 years ago it wouldn’t have bothered me much - but now I can’t face it. So you’re not alone.

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  • in reply to Mister

    I think it’s very good advice to suggest that you be forgiving of yourself and your son. I’m not sure how old your son is or what his situation is? I think a lot of us lose confidence at various points in our lives (I know I have). The pandemic has had a big impact on mine and my sons confidence levels and our ability to face things and do things. Eg this week we had to go to IKEA (which none of us like) - I drove us there but when we got there neither I or my son could face going in as it was so crowded and awful - so my husband went in to get what we needed while we stayed outside. We just couldn’t face it. But I don’t blame us for that - we struggle with I push large places like that. 4 years ago it wouldn’t have bothered me much - but now I can’t face it. So you’re not alone.

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