It really sucks having autism and then you get dropped mental health right on top of it. I like some aspects of ASD, good memory, noticing the smallest details that most miss, stimming... but then there’s the anxiety, the depression, mental health... apparently all three are more common in people with autism. I find it both intriguing and extremely annoying. Mental health is a weird one, your own brain can push you so hard and it’s you doing it but at the same time you’re fighting back. I had a moment the other night where my brain kicked me hard and I ended up wearing very little, windows open and my fan on until I was so cold I felt sick and couldn’t feel my body. I phoned up my mental health team when I was sufficiently recovered and the woman on the other end sounded bored and made no attempt to hide that she couldn’t care less. The call last four minutes twenty one seconds in which she ended it suggesting I watch a film. No goodbye or take care, just hung up after that. Nice to know the professionals care isn’t it?
I've promised myself that if I recover and get to a good place again I will make a huge effort to do more for the autistic and mental health communities. I was doing this a few years ago but since I've not done so well but I want to get back to that again when I'm ready.
Sorry for pouring my heart and worries here. I hope everyone else is doing well and has had a good summer, not that it’s been particularly summery I know.
