It’s been a tough time of it lately. I feel like I’ve been in a stormy ocean, struggling to stay afloat. That’s a good way of explaining both anxiety and depression, bipolar effects for me, where the waves can almost be dead still, then suddenly they become ferocious and throw me all over and threaten to drown me. The last few weeks have been horrible. My anxiety has been crippling, some days I didn’t leave my room. My depression has hit the very bottom but I know soon it will rise and I’ll be full of the joys of spring again. I don’t know why my head does this to me. If it worked with me instead of against me we could do remarkable things, but no, it’s always fighting me, trying to drag me to hell. I am fortuitous that my meds seem to help, with few side effects and the ones I do get are tolerable. I’ve got a psychiatrist, not trained in autism but she seems OK to me. I started yoga, since that I’ve been sleeping better. Been in email contact with the National Autistic Society and they have been supportive and friendly, coaxing me back. Feeling more positive and excitement, recovering, feeling mania again.
Onwards and upwards as they say.
