Under-Stimulation?

I only work two days a week, but I find work exhausts me. I come home feeling pretty awful, burnt out and like someone has squished my brain. On Monday, listened to some music while doing some boring data entry and it seemed to help alleviate some of the burnt out “brain being squished” feeling. I usually only listen to music at work for very mindless tasks, not data entry, as I worry about being distracted, but the task I was doing is, to some extent, self-correcting, and often makes me feel a little ill staring at the computer screen (although a lot of my job involves that). The music seemed to help and I wondered if, rather than being over-stimulated at work, I’m actually being under-stimulated.

My understanding is that autistics have sensitive senses that can be easily over-stimulated, but can also go crazy if under-stimulated. (This may be why we stim.) The office I work in is gloomy and badly lit and, now the building works outside have finished, fairly quiet. Autistics often complain about bright light, but I think I am, or have become, hypo-sensitive to light i.e. I struggle with dim lights in ways that I haven’t yet been able to put into words. Gloomy lighting makes me feel vaguely sad, a bit tired and perhaps something else that I’m not sure of yet. There’s a level of “peopling” in the job with my boss, J, in the room all the time, but he’s very quiet and we barely talk except about work things. Occasionally other people from the building come in to talk to J, but never for long. I do have to use the phone sometimes, but not often. So I wonder if I get under-stimulated and whether listening to music more might help? Or getting a brighter light over my desk (although I'm not sure how I would explain this to J).

What do you think? Have you got any experience of under-stimulation?

  • When I’m under-stimulated I go catatonic, and go into a daydream stupor and unawareness, so for me under-stimulation only seems to be painful for others in a social setting..

  • Interesting, thanks.

  • I'm glad I'm not the only autistic who struggles with dim lighting rather than bright lighting. That is hard about falling asleep in winter.

  • I find music helpful with some things, distracting for others. I guess it might be trial and error to see which tasks are which.

    I will look into getting a bright desk lamp, thanks.

  • If I'm struggling to concentrate on desk work I put on one of those long tracks that are intended as background music for tabletop RPGs. They're instrumental or just general background noise and they keep the wandering part of my mind engaged so the rest of it can focus on the work. So yes, I do find that if I'm understimulated it can help to provide something fairly unobtrusive to get my brain back on track.

  • I also struggle with dim lighting. I find it depressing. I haven't managed to find lights bright enough to allow me to stay awake for long after the sun goes down, which is a big problem in winter. The few in-person autistic events I've been to have been difficult for this reason - there's a tendency to close curtains and dim lights to make them "accessible."

    I work better to music, although it needs to not have lyrics if I'm doing anything word-based, like reading or writing. I use piano music playlists on Spotify or ambient music on YouTube.

  • It definitely helps me to focus when I have some minimalist music on in the background. I feel like it ties up enough of the back of my brain that the conscious part can just do its thing. 

    If the room is poorly lit that will put more strain on your eyes if you're looking at a screen, so I would definitely look into at least getting a lamp for your desk.