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Concerns about going on antidepressants

Samuel

UPDATE : I posted an update to this situation in a reply below, but to cut it short, i decided to go on antidepressants after considering what the replies had to say about them and my general situation.

I also did change the title of the post for accuracy and to better represent the focus

ORIGINAL POST: 

A bit of background. I am 19, failed college 3 years ago due to social difficulties and have been looking for a job since. My parents are divorced and i live with my mum and 2 siblings. I have been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder only and not depression or anything else."

My mum wants me to go on antidepressants because she thinks i am unwell but i dont want to for multiple reasons. I want to outline them and i would appreciate thoughts or advice.

1st is that i find it hard to trust doctors anymore because i have a lot of trauma with going to the hospital due to suicidal feelings and feeling rejected/invalidated. I have had a counsellor and a therapist before and they both reported me for saying i was suicidal so i feel like it's not safe to talk to professionals anymore about how i truly feel.

2ndly is that i don't want to be dependant on anything because i fear situations i won't have access to them. Because i have expressed suicidal feelings before they would most likely give them to my mum who have to administer it to me. She is not always around. She is forgetful and gets drunk a few times a week. It's likely i won't be able to take these exactly as directed which would cause anxiety. 

3rdly and lastly is that i fear the concept of antidepressants is unnatural and or dangerous. I feel like i have valid reasons for why i feel so depressed and i feel like it wouldn't lead for anything good for me to block that out. I have heard reports of antidepressants making people more suicidal or likely to self harm and these are things i have struggled with in the past before. Also, i have heard before that believing that your medication won't work may actually make them less likely to work and the opposite can also be true. Idk if that is factual but it makes sense to me.


Also to go into about my reasons for feeling depressed. For me not having any friends has always been very difficult for me to live with and i am only becoming more and more socially isolated as my life goes on. I have limited interests, it's very rare i feel immersed or enjoy anything anymore. I find it impossible to relax and even go to sleep at a normal time. I have nothing to spend my energy on so i am awake for many more hours longer than i was when i had high school so that is why. In general i just feel like life is not worth living for me. I see much more despair and suffering in the world than i see hope and pure joy. But i cannot kill myself because the pain is too much, i have no realistic way of doing so. 

So overall i just feel like antidepressants will not help and make me feel worse, do you agree or disagree?


Parents

  • Hi, My mum used to say the same to me and doctors tried multiple times to prescribe antidepressants- i have multiple reasons why I didn’t want to take any (some similar to yours). A key point for me was that whenever I was struggling there were clear reasons contributing to my unhappiness  (such as being in a bad environment, isolated, not being paid for work, in a stressful environment, unhappy with job etc). So I felt what I needed was to make changes to my situation and not take antidepressants to numb me and allow me to cope and tolerate the situation. (Also I am stubborn and I do not trust medication that changes neurotransmitter levels in the whole brain...plus there can be a lot of side effects and it can be trial and error to figure out if it works). I do believe that antidepressants can be helpful for some people- it can help people to give them the strength to make a change and get out of a bad situation or if nothing can be done about the situation (eg. you are grieving) then maybe it can give some comfort and help someone keep going. However I feel like all too often doctors just prescribe antidepressants without also looking at external and environmental factors that are contributing! And in this case it seems to me that the antidepressants are then mainly ‘helping’ someone tolerate a bad situation rather than helping them get out. 
    A professional I know who feels similarly about antidepressants once said to me how she replied to a friend who suggested she should take antidepressants: « I don’t need antidepressants, I need a divorce » (this was someone who was in an abusive relationship). 
    I think it is highly individual and if used well antidepressants can probably help people get better and make positive changes. 
    I’ve never taken any and that was right for me. I made changes instead to my life and I am of course also working on myself by trying to learn grounding techniques, better stress management and figure out how I work best. 

    I think it really depends on the person and situation. What I really want to tell you though is that antidepressants or no antidepressants you can make changes to your life and address these things that are making you unhappy- change is terrifying for me but I do not regret any of the changes I made- it gives confidence to give things a go- because then you know no matter what if things aren’t right you can and will get out- so then it gets easier to try new things too in future because it feels less risky and scary if you know you can get through things and change again if necessary 

Reply

  • Hi, My mum used to say the same to me and doctors tried multiple times to prescribe antidepressants- i have multiple reasons why I didn’t want to take any (some similar to yours). A key point for me was that whenever I was struggling there were clear reasons contributing to my unhappiness  (such as being in a bad environment, isolated, not being paid for work, in a stressful environment, unhappy with job etc). So I felt what I needed was to make changes to my situation and not take antidepressants to numb me and allow me to cope and tolerate the situation. (Also I am stubborn and I do not trust medication that changes neurotransmitter levels in the whole brain...plus there can be a lot of side effects and it can be trial and error to figure out if it works). I do believe that antidepressants can be helpful for some people- it can help people to give them the strength to make a change and get out of a bad situation or if nothing can be done about the situation (eg. you are grieving) then maybe it can give some comfort and help someone keep going. However I feel like all too often doctors just prescribe antidepressants without also looking at external and environmental factors that are contributing! And in this case it seems to me that the antidepressants are then mainly ‘helping’ someone tolerate a bad situation rather than helping them get out. 
    A professional I know who feels similarly about antidepressants once said to me how she replied to a friend who suggested she should take antidepressants: « I don’t need antidepressants, I need a divorce » (this was someone who was in an abusive relationship). 
    I think it is highly individual and if used well antidepressants can probably help people get better and make positive changes. 
    I’ve never taken any and that was right for me. I made changes instead to my life and I am of course also working on myself by trying to learn grounding techniques, better stress management and figure out how I work best. 

    I think it really depends on the person and situation. What I really want to tell you though is that antidepressants or no antidepressants you can make changes to your life and address these things that are making you unhappy- change is terrifying for me but I do not regret any of the changes I made- it gives confidence to give things a go- because then you know no matter what if things aren’t right you can and will get out- so then it gets easier to try new things too in future because it feels less risky and scary if you know you can get through things and change again if necessary 

Children
  • in reply to Ann :)

    And I actually also think maybe going back into education or taking some Courses could be a great idea if that is something that you think you might like? Also it’s important to keep in mind when you are feeling so low not many things will feel very appealing. In that case sometimes it can be helpful to go with things you’ve always wanted to do or that you know you liked in past