I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety and depression for just over a year now, I have tried medication and it doesn’t help me. My doctor has referred me and asked me personally if I am autistic due to me explaining I cannot control my emotions at times. I am a 26 year old adult who hates social situations, only eat a certain type of foods and cannot control my emotions.
A few hours ago I had a major meltdown with my family in the middle of it, my sister is staying with me (I live in student halls) and has recently broken up with her most current boyfriend. She works nights so this morning I made breakfast for us, showered and went to the library (left her my key incase the fire alarm went off and she couldn’t get back into sleep) so I didn’t have a key all day.
I text her when she finally woke up to tell her when to come downstairs as I was bursting for the toilet, and I had to walk through the city too. She wasn’t even there and I gave her enough warning as I was so desperate for the loo. She comes down the stairs with her ex boyfriend who she just broke up with?? She didn’t tell me he was at my place with her she didn’t even ask me. I literally just couldn’t cope dealing with another awkward encounter with him as he’s made it clear he doesn’t like me and would never let her see me.
anyway
I then lost control of my emotions and said it wasn’t on and we had a screaming match. She called me horrible names and in the moment I wanted her away from my space and me so I asked horribly if she could leave. She then insulted me even more by saying she will buy any other things she’s left herself as she works and I don’t due to waiting for my diagnosis my parents just moved to the other side of the world and my sleeping and eating is all over the place I’m just a let down.
my mums an issue with alcohol and lives in Australia, and my sister phoned her straight after the argument so mums immediately taken her side and has also given me an earful of insults.
now I have the worst headache I feel like the worst human being and have apologised and asked her to come back and she’s ignoring me.
Keep crying when I think about it and I just feel so to blame and hate myself for not being able to control my emotions like I should be able too as an adult especially with my sister.
any advice to cheer up 