The plate dispenser theory of issues, trauma and heartache.

 Have you ever gone to a cafe or restaurant and seen one of these things. On the top it seems like there are 3 or 2 plates. But actually there is a spring under the plates and a long shaft they can descend into. There could be 3 plates, or 13, or 20 or more. It seems to me this is the perfect metaphor for the traumas and personal issues that stick to you. To those observing you from a distance it seems you are dealing with 2 or 3 big crisis or emotional issues. It even feels that way to you because the latest fire you've been fighting has forced you to shelve the issues you were wrestling. But if you are fortunate enough to take a plate off the stack you'll find the ones beneath it still there even things from years ago. Over the years it gets deeper and deeper. And everyone around you just assumes all you need to do is deal with the 3 plates. They don't see the heartache from 10 or 20 years ago that's going to emerge if enough of the stack gets taken off you that you can decompress. And you get to the point where it feels like it will never end. You'll never has resolution. And things will never get better because people can't see what you're really battling and even if they could they wouldn't know how to help. It's all below the surface to them.

Does any of this make sense? Can you relate to it?

Parents
  • Visiting cafés and restaurants is an infrequent activity for me, and if I have ever seen one of those things then it clearly didn't leave a lasting impression on me. However, I recognise that the purpose of your post wasn't to discuss the thing featured in the image.

    What you have written in your post makes sense, and I think I can relate to it.

    When there are deep-rooted issues, I think that unless we make a point of talking about them, there can sometimes be an assumption by others to think those issues have since been resolved. 

    I think most people carry around baggage that other people may not be aware of, especially the older we get. As you rightly say, even if they did know, there is no guarantee that they would know how to help. For example, some of my baggage is stuff that will most likely never be resolved. Sure, people can offer a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on, and whilst I am always appreciative of that, I feel it's up to me to somehow learn to live with some of that stuff.

Reply
  • Visiting cafés and restaurants is an infrequent activity for me, and if I have ever seen one of those things then it clearly didn't leave a lasting impression on me. However, I recognise that the purpose of your post wasn't to discuss the thing featured in the image.

    What you have written in your post makes sense, and I think I can relate to it.

    When there are deep-rooted issues, I think that unless we make a point of talking about them, there can sometimes be an assumption by others to think those issues have since been resolved. 

    I think most people carry around baggage that other people may not be aware of, especially the older we get. As you rightly say, even if they did know, there is no guarantee that they would know how to help. For example, some of my baggage is stuff that will most likely never be resolved. Sure, people can offer a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on, and whilst I am always appreciative of that, I feel it's up to me to somehow learn to live with some of that stuff.

Children
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