Hello,
I have been finding it really hard to get along with some of the people in my home, and some of the relationships with the staff who work here day and night have been difficult.
I am a 24-year-old autistic adult who has been living at this particular supported accommodation for 2 years now. I am going to be leaving due to the lack of awareness and judgmental, unprofessional behaviour.
I would like to talk about what happened today because it did make me angry. As someone with a temper and a criminal record, I was very close to smashing this person's face in. I was fed up with the ongoing negative comments that these people have been saying about me and my physical appearance. They tell me I need to shower, go to sleep, dictate what I should do with my hair, ask me silly questions, and repeatedly say things to trigger me and get a reaction from me. I don't know why they do this, but it seems to be the case.
Firstly, the staff allowed me to go without medication for 2 days, which only led to my mom being stressed for me on Mother's Day. We did manage to get this resolved, but the staff delivers medication to me outside my door day and night. Sometimes instead of giving it, they always have to require the last word and will ask me, "Have I showered?" "You need to do this," or say, "What has happened to your face?" because of my skin condition. Just mentioning things to me. I have tried to understand things from their point of view, and I know that I can see things differently, but their attitude towards me seems like they are teasing me and getting a reaction from me constantly. For the first time, I spoke to my auntie about this on the phone and was nearly in tears when I tried to talk to her about it. She is coming to my house on Saturday with mom, and usually, I speak to my mom about these things, but there have been ongoing issues, and my mom is always the first to hear about it.
After speaking to my auntie on the phone, I eventually calmed down and reflected on the situation. I took a little walk around the estate and saw the cat while video calling my friend. That helped a lot, and when I came back home, I rang the doorbell, and the lady who upset me earlier, and who I was telling my auntie about, started asking me, "Why are you ringing the doorbell?" while smiling in my face, trying to annoy me or provoke a reaction. How this made me feel was very small inside, and I didn't feel comfortable with her talking to me, but I needed my medication, and she is a human being. I am trying to be civil and ignore these negative conversations that are ongoing.
Another situation is like they are talking to me in a very quiet threatening tone, saying things that provoke me every day, getting into my personal space, annoying me, and trying to control me and my emotions. I asked them nicely to stop, but when I do tell them what they are doing, they sometimes become passive-aggressive towards me. They will knock on my door and repeatedly say things to me in a friendly way to upset me to win this silly game that they are playing.
I wish I could tell them to stop, but I have never been that kind of person