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Therapy

Catlover

Ok, I started talking therapy for a number of issues. I didn’t expect an autism specialist lol, but I didn’t expect to hear this in the first 10 minutes:

Oh, but you sound very able.

You must have it really mild.

Me: there’s no such thing as mild autism, you either have autism or you don’t.

oh, so you don’t have it then.

Me: Yes! I am autistic, I have a diagnosis. I’m pointing out that you cannot get a diagnosis if you don’t meet all the criteria and if it doesn’t affect how you live your life each day.

I can’t be bothered to outline the rest. But putting that aside, it was good to air some things I’ve otherwise never spoken about.

Parents

  • Since my own (later in life) diagnosis at age 52, I’ve experienced at first hand, including from family, how many people, perhaps motivated by prejudice and discriminatory attitudes “point blank” refuse to understand the condition and who believe and maintain that the only way to effectively manage this condition is by means of ultra-strict Millitary style discipline in every aspect of our lives right down to the smallest detail, including by means of a live-in carer, as in thier view people with this condition must never be permitted to live alone, that travelling long distances unchaperoned is inappropriate, as such people firmly believe and maintain that lack of “proper” discipline in childhood is the root cause of our condition - some of my extended family members are ex-Millitary and they refuse to see it in any other terms 

  • in reply to IrishInManchesterUK

    That sounds very controlling and somewhat concerning. Are you being subjected to such ultra strict 'discipline'?

    I wonder if the kind of attitude and prejudice you describe is more prevalent in Ireland than in the UK. Here the idea of a live in carer or a chaperone is a long way from the actual reality of available support for most autistic adults. I live alone and would certainly not need or want a live in carer. I would love to have a chaperone to help me navigate a stressful long distance journey, but such services do not exist.

    Sadly there are many people who refuse to accept or understand autism. Many more seem to believe that autism is something that only affects children and the only people requiring support are the parents of the autistic children. Autistic adults are in the main just left to get on with it without support.

  • in reply to Autonomistic
    Autonomistic said:
    but such services do not exist.

    If you live anywhere near me I could provide such a service, on a paid or "time exchanged" basis.... 

    I'm having some luck obtaining the help I need by exchanging my time with people directly. I have £40.00 an hour skills that I'm quite happy to trade on an hour by hour basis with other people, even if their time is notionally "worth less" than my own, because an hour of my life really is worth no more or less than an hour of your life when all is said and done and pretension is stripped away.

    Having a partner on a journey is great, it reduces security issues massively. Find someone to trade time with, it cuts out all that "money thinking", and kinda makes things fairer and more equal.

    Of course that presumes you know what you have to offer others that is useful.

    THAT can be a task in itself some days!

Reply
  • in reply to Autonomistic
    Autonomistic said:
    but such services do not exist.

    If you live anywhere near me I could provide such a service, on a paid or "time exchanged" basis.... 

    I'm having some luck obtaining the help I need by exchanging my time with people directly. I have £40.00 an hour skills that I'm quite happy to trade on an hour by hour basis with other people, even if their time is notionally "worth less" than my own, because an hour of my life really is worth no more or less than an hour of your life when all is said and done and pretension is stripped away.

    Having a partner on a journey is great, it reduces security issues massively. Find someone to trade time with, it cuts out all that "money thinking", and kinda makes things fairer and more equal.

    Of course that presumes you know what you have to offer others that is useful.

    THAT can be a task in itself some days!

Children
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