Therapy

Ok, I started talking therapy for a number of issues. I didn’t expect an autism specialist lol, but I didn’t expect to hear this in the first 10 minutes:

Oh, but you sound very able.

You must have it really mild.

Me: there’s no such thing as mild autism, you either have autism or you don’t.

oh, so you don’t have it then.

Me: Yes! I am autistic, I have a diagnosis. I’m pointing out that you cannot get a diagnosis if you don’t meet all the criteria and if it doesn’t affect how you live your life each day.

I can’t be bothered to outline the rest. But putting that aside, it was good to air some things I’ve otherwise never spoken about.

Parents
  • I’m off today as annual leave to try and deal with exhaustion. But I’m having the worst anxiety of my life and that’s saying something! Some realisations and revelations have tilted my already wobbly world on it’s axis and I’m so glad I have my therapy session tonight, though I have texted in advance to let her know I’m having a breakdown. The world is laughing at me for being so slow for some pennies to drop - it’s happened before, and it’s happening again- and to pick up on some crucial betrayals. I’m on my own, and always have been. Life can be very cruel. 

  • The world is laughing at me

    The world is an idiot.

    I've written to you, but I'd much rather that you'd be here amongst us; we all do. x

Reply Children
  • Thanks old bean. I know you also sometimes fret about saying/posting too much (needlessly in your case, it’s all great stuff) so you’ll understand that I felt I should give everyone a break from my bommbardment of posts, while I was melting down anyway. But it’s nice to be made to feel so welcome and appreciated. Or, let’s say toleratedSlight smile