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Anger issues

Purplestarsxoxo

I’ve always had anger issues since high school. It got worse as I got older and I think it has ruined many friendships. I’m afraid of losing my current friends now because of my anger issues. How do I cope with them? I don’t like to meditate because it makes me anxious. I do like yoga and I do like to color. I was bullied a lot and I hated myself for being the weird kid in school. How do I learn to let go of my painful past? 

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  • How exactly does mediation make you anxious? I'm trying to find a possible connection if it's the way I interpret your description.

    Mediation (focusing the brain), playing chess, painting, writing a novel, translating etc. where I use my brain in a more cognitive state, thinking/comparing/finding solutions... leads me into a depressive state that lasts for 2-3 days, before I normalize. It's like my brain is not built to think like that or restricted, and when I force it, it ends up with wasting all my serotonin.

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  • How exactly does mediation make you anxious? I'm trying to find a possible connection if it's the way I interpret your description.

    Mediation (focusing the brain), playing chess, painting, writing a novel, translating etc. where I use my brain in a more cognitive state, thinking/comparing/finding solutions... leads me into a depressive state that lasts for 2-3 days, before I normalize. It's like my brain is not built to think like that or restricted, and when I force it, it ends up with wasting all my serotonin.

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