Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I was talking to a lovely member yesterday about anxiety and I realised that I literally have no coping tactics for my anxiety and it's getting worse. I'm not sure how it is for everyone else, but for me it is terrible. Feel drained when I'm anxious, I'm tired all the time. I get the shakes in my hands. Upset stomach. Feel sick. And I become so jumpy and on edge. Like if the doorbell rings I become so scared and panicky that I have a panic attack, it's that bad. If I go out I'm the exact same and if I see more than one person the exact same thing happens. I have passed out before which makes it so much worse and embarrassing for me. I hardly go out now, if I do I avoid really busy places but I don't like to be alone either in case I'm attacked by someone. I have my dog who is also my best friend but she's not very protective so doesn't help this. I'm on edge and anxious now just writing this so I'm going to stop now. It's getting worse and I don't know what to do to make it better. There's always the doctor but that thought makes the anxiety even worse. I could call my old hospital but I don't know if they'll help me with anxiety and also talking on the phone is a trigger for me.
I'd be really interested to know what you do to cope with your anxiety, if you struggle with it as well.
Hi,
My anxiety has got much more manageable after having CBT and talking therapy through the NHS so I can recommend trying to get some of that. You can ask someone you trust to be with you on the phone so they can talk for you when it gets hard or your GP might have an email address where you can explain your difficulties talking on the phone and they can make suggestions.
I would recommend looking into CBT and Mindfulness while you wait (because waitlists can be long) CBT can give you a different perspective on your anxiety so you can work your way through tasks that make you anxious. Mindfulness kind of gives you the space to change your thought patterns. I'm not explaining this well but trust me, it's worth looking into books and YouTube videos.
The woman who diagnosed me said that some anxiety therapies work by correcting your fear response to a theoretical threat that doesn't exist and that's where CBT is helpful, it can stop you being afraid of say getting in the bus if your fear is hypothetical and not really reality, but autistic people are often afraid and anxious because of real consequences that neurotypical people don't experience, eg. "If I go to dinner round a friend's house and I try to explain that I don't like my food cooked like that, their parents may get angry at me for being rude." So in that case you are dealing with an anxiety reaction to a real worry that may actually happen. And that's where mindfulness is more helpful than CBT because it teaches you to be more comfortable with difficult feelings and experiences while still acknowledging that they are real.
Please don't give up because anxiety can get easier to deal with. I still get anxious days but I am SOOO much better that I was and I never thought I would be in a million years.
That’s really interesting - thank you (Melon). It’s encouraging to hear that you’ve made progress - sometimes i worry I’ll feel like this forever, so it’s good to hear that you’ve found things that ally help. I’m on a waiting list for CBT but have only just gone on the list - so I think it will be many months before I get that help. I’ve found some good things on YouTube - but they’re very genal so not a replacement for proper therapy. Thanks