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Searching for being "good enough"?

mrs.snooks

Hi all. I wondered if you had any tips of ways of helping to believe being "good enough".

I am a perfectionist and also quite competitive. Work is very important to me and I compare myself to a colleague who is super brilliant at the job we do. I am having trouble believing I am good enough, when I am not as good as her.

A friend has said that it is about being "good enough" and I believe that is what I am looking for, but it is not always possible for me to believe that about myself. 

I struggle with the problems I have with my austism a lot of the time and work is important because it gives me value in myself. I'm struggling to find value in my life today.

I kjnow that I am more than my job. But work feels like is the only thing that I am good at, so when someone is bettter than me, it really shakes my confidence.

Any advice would be really appreciated.

Parents

  • I identify with your feelings. 

    I cannot speak for you but here is my experience for what it is worth. 

     I naturally tend to compare my insides with the outsides of others.  

    Because I find communication difficult I assume everyone is doing perfectly and am surprised when I learn that everyone is -like me- going through life challenges. 
    I got the strength from somewhere inside myself to ask my colleagues for advice on how they do certain things.  I didn’t get fired and I’m fact it probably improved the atmosphere at work when I demonstrate honesty and an attitude of investment in my work in that open way.

    I consciously wish my colleagues - and any living human being - well: ‘ May they have health, happiness, peace and love in their lives’.  Looking for ways to help others -as I am trying to do right now, writing this - is part of my personal nourishment.  
    Some of my problems are feelings of needing to satiate infinite needs within me but  that specific over-focus on myself is sometimes actually torture posing as hope. 
    I need to find ways to feed an attitude in me where I am ‘hoping for the benefit of others’.



Reply

  • I identify with your feelings. 

    I cannot speak for you but here is my experience for what it is worth. 

     I naturally tend to compare my insides with the outsides of others.  

    Because I find communication difficult I assume everyone is doing perfectly and am surprised when I learn that everyone is -like me- going through life challenges. 
    I got the strength from somewhere inside myself to ask my colleagues for advice on how they do certain things.  I didn’t get fired and I’m fact it probably improved the atmosphere at work when I demonstrate honesty and an attitude of investment in my work in that open way.

    I consciously wish my colleagues - and any living human being - well: ‘ May they have health, happiness, peace and love in their lives’.  Looking for ways to help others -as I am trying to do right now, writing this - is part of my personal nourishment.  
    Some of my problems are feelings of needing to satiate infinite needs within me but  that specific over-focus on myself is sometimes actually torture posing as hope. 
    I need to find ways to feed an attitude in me where I am ‘hoping for the benefit of others’.



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