Autistic Women?

Finding this discussion group has been SO helpful. I am in the early stages of recognising my autistic self and like many others I expect have/had doubts about the validity of self diagnosis.

I am lucky in that I have a very good counsellor. I had no awareness that my anxiety and social anxiety could be due to being on the spectrum but she has helped me realise that it is highly likely.

I am very much someone who likes to know rather than just suspect, however the thought of being assessed by neurotypical clinicians scares me. My traits are on the whole mild, and not noticeable however I realise now I have great difficulties with emotional expression and social interaction and these have blighted my life. However, I am luckier than many; I have a career and a lovely husband.

I, too, suspect the menopause has made it harder to deal with life. My anxiety has been through the roof at times and it's so much more difficult to mask when you're already above your threshold of stress! I hate taking any kind of meds so really didn't pursue the HRT option. 

So after doing (and redoing) all the online autism tests, reading everything I can on the topic (particularly relating to women) and recalibrating my life through the autistic lens I am as close as I can be to saying, yes I am autistic. I feel very positive about it and so happy to have the chance to connect with people that understand.

Glad you find these discussions helpful, I do too, though I tend to go in an out of reading them because I'm so exhausted from work etc to keep up with reading all the posts. I think it's still very hard for women to get a diagnosis as, in Australia at least, psych's are still using the ASD criteria for kids (DSM-5 from the USA). My diagnosis from a few weeks ago included the phrase 'ASD can't be ruled out' in the diagnosis. So is that a positive diagnosis? I'm taking it as a positive diagnosis, not because of this, but because my symptoms follow all ASD traits except for the fact that I'm not a little boy running around hysterically, making no eye contact (which is what most diagnosticians are looking for!). My online Autism Quotient Test score is 45/50 consistently, another reason I'm taking it as a YES, despite the lukewarm diagnosis (which cost me $1000, by the way). So I absolutely feel that the ONLY way women can get a true diagnosis is self-diagnosis, that is, until they update the diagnostic criteria for adults and then, much later I would imagine (as per the global patriarchy), for adult women. As women, we know ourselves so much more than anyone else, we know we fit the main ASD criteria, and we know that accepting the self-diagnosis of autism will liberate us from the tyranny of 'what the hell's wrong with me?' thinking. I'm also in menopause, like you, which also definitely contributes to making the negative symptoms worse. I wish you all the best with your journey :) 

Glad you find these discussions helpful, I do too, though I tend to go in an out of reading them because I'm so exhausted from work etc to keep up with reading all the posts. I think it's still very hard for women to get a diagnosis as, in Australia at least, psych's are still using the ASD criteria for kids (DSM-5 from the USA). My diagnosis from a few weeks ago included the phrase 'ASD can't be ruled out' in the diagnosis. So is that a positive diagnosis? I'm taking it as a positive diagnosis, not because of this, but because my symptoms follow all ASD traits except for the fact that I'm not a little boy running around hysterically, making no eye contact (which is what most diagnosticians are looking for!). My online Autism Quotient Test score is 45/50 consistently, another reason I'm taking it as a YES, despite the lukewarm diagnosis (which cost me $1000, by the way). So I absolutely feel that the ONLY way women can get a true diagnosis is self-diagnosis, that is, until they update the diagnostic criteria for adults and then, much later I would imagine (as per the global patriarchy), for adult women. As women, we know ourselves so much more than anyone else, we know we fit the main ASD criteria, and we know that accepting the self-diagnosis of autism will liberate us from the tyranny of 'what the hell's wrong with me?' thinking. I'm also in menopause, like you, which also definitely contributes to making the negative symptoms worse. I wish you all the best with your journey :) 

I don't think people would part with that sort of money unless they truly felt different to others and needed answers about their life. No one wants to be autistic. "Normal" people don't go looking for answers of why they feel fundamentally different because they don't feel it.