• Replies 5 replies
  • Subscribers 8 subscribers
  • Views 1155 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Anxiety

Meeples

My anxiety is terrible and I don't know what to do about it anymore. I cannot handle the news at all. I'd had to stop watching it, which makes me feel so weak and pathetic. I get too scared to go to sleep, worried about being on my own, terrified about something happening to my children. I worry about small things like socialising, health and cleaning the house, to huge issues like climate change and social or political injustice. I get chest pains in the day and wake up in the night from terrible dreams, drenched in sweat with my heart pounding so fast and hard that I feel sick. 

I tried to talk to the doctor about it a few years back and they were so dismissive and made me feel like the things I disclosed to them weren't a big deal. They actually used the words "and what do you want us to do about it?" when I said I felt really anxious and overwhelmed. I have changed doctors surgeries since then, and the doctors at the new place seem really nice and all, but I don't think I have the nerve to go back and open up like that again. Its so hard, especially when you have ten minutes to get across everything that's happening. Even if they did take me seriously I don't know what I want them to do. I'm not a fan of medication, especially as most of it can have horrible side effects.

Its effecting me physically too. I have terrible digestive problems, constant jaw pain, skin issues, migraines, joint stiffness and back and neck problems. All of which I have spoken to the doctor about both separately and together and have got mainly got shrugged shoulders. Of course, being anxious, I worry that all these things are signs of something scary that's being missed. I also don't know if it could be perimenopause. I am about the right age. I did suggest that last time I went to the GP, but when the doctor found it couldn't be full menopause yet she again just dismissed it saying, "well that's probably just the bit before menopause. That can last ten years or more. We can't do anything about that." But that's terrifying because it all feels like its getting so much more severe already.

I've tried stuff like exercise, meditation, self hypnosis, various things to reset the vagus nerve, several sessions of therapeutic yoga and I even went to a few sessions with a private counsellor a few years ago (it went terribly, he just sat there silently expecting me to talk and I didn't have a clue what to say, which proved both very frustrating and a waste of time and money).

If you are still reading, thank you. I don't even really know what I expect anyone to post here. Has anyone else been through this, or are you going through it? Have you found anything that helps? Did medication work or something else for you? Was my experience of counselling just rubbish or is that normal? Any advice or support would be welcome. Thanks 

Parents

  • Yes, anxiety is terrible, I've had to deal with mine, as I had other health issues that might have been related to anxiety and depression.  Counselling is not really going to reduce anxiety, you might feel better just talking about things though.  You could try counselling or therapy via email if verbalising things is difficult.  I had to learn to verbalise what was happening with me, I started off with major life things but didn't mention internal things so never got the help I needed.  Its taken years to get better at it.

    The thoughts we have affect our feelings, and then our feelings can affect our thoughts.  What starts as mild anxiety, becomes more severe, then we might get depressed, and become stressed and tense.  All this takes its toll on body, not just the mind.  Your health problems might be unrelated, but best to tackling the anxiety anyway.

    It is hard work to reduce anxiety, but the best way is to start to take control of your thoughts so you don't dwell.

    CBT is a good therapy technique, because you learn to reduce the severity of your thoughts, more rational and health, and you can learn to stop the thought cycles and loops.  I can recommend a book that has really helped me, 'Overcoming Anxiety And Depression on the Autism Spectrum' by Lee Wilkinson.  At the start it may seem strange to try and think different, because that is all you know, but if you keep going then you start to notice it working and that helps you keep going.

    Other things that can help are mindfulness and distracting yourself by doing something.

    You are free to interrupt your thoughts at any time, you don't have to let them go around.  Try shouting in your head 'Stop!', and see what happens.

    You can also counter the thoughts you have, if you have a thought like  'the world is going to end!', reply to it with 'don't be daft' and laugh it off.  You can also choose not to engage with thoughts.  You can choose to think of better things.  You can play music in your head (if you are able to of course).

    Another thing that can help when feeling swamped or things are getting to you - just think loudly 'I choose not to suffer', and then don't engage with thoughts for a bit.  Also, now and then think 'I am coping'.

    Using different methods like that has really helped, not sure just one of them would have made as much difference.

    I also recommend the book 'A mindfulness guide for the frazzled' by Ruby Wax, she has suffered from mental health issues (her mother worse). She learnt about how the brain works and about mindfulness, and that really helped her, so she wrote a book to help others.

    It is hard work to reduce anxiety, but the best way is to start to take control of your thoughts so you don't dwell.

    Taking control of your thoughts tells your brain you are in control, coping, and that means anxiety and bad feelings should reduce.  Takes time though.  

  • in reply to Autimator

    Anti-anxiety medication can help reduce anxiety, so something to consider and chat with your GP about.

    Medication helped me a bit, but working on my thoughts has made a massive difference.

    Its worth trying things and see what works for you.

Reply Children
No Data