distraction techniques

Hi

First I would like to distinguish between self-harm with no interest in ending oneself:

I did lots of experiments as a kid, that were self-harming, though I did not have a concept of self-harm atm. Like ''How it feels when electricity is running trough your body?'', my sister saved me by turning a desk lamp off, where I had my fist instead of light bulb, or ''Human body resistance to heat'' when my mom caught me doing what she described as ''cooking my hand''.

and a suicide, though I prefer to call it seppuku, suicide has such a bad connotations in western culture.

I tried as a teenager, I made a plan that wouldn't implicate anybody, and I wouldn't be found or interrupted, than I tried, but it did not work. I tried to freeze to death, I though naked winter time at -30°C in a forest would guarantee that, I lasted 2 days and hunger made me change my mind and go back. That left me puzzled, but I used it to convince myself that obviously it wasn't my time. 

Since then i had recurring thoughts about doing it again, my life isn't exactly going well, just fighting for survival. But I recognise those thoughts now and fight them before I get to making a plan. 

Only you have the power to do it either way, so convince yourself you hacve a reason. Here are those i use:

Don't give them (them=NTs)  satisfaction by proving them right. I heard olften that I will come up to nothing good or end up in mental asylum from family and strangers throughout my childhood.. Being stubborn helped me in this one.

If you have a partner and/or kids you have an obligation to them to persevere after all they are our choice in our life. No longer an option for me.

I want to see how the world will turn out, what else humans will invent.

Things I want to learn, that requires time.

Things and places I want to see.

I want to get my pension for which i have been paying taxes. Otherwise i would be complicit in goverment and pension funds running scam on people by taking their money and not paying anything in r.eturn

You can make arguments both ways, The choice is yours, i wish you good luck.

Hi

First I would like to distinguish between self-harm with no interest in ending oneself:

I did lots of experiments as a kid, that were self-harming, though I did not have a concept of self-harm atm. Like ''How it feels when electricity is running trough your body?'', my sister saved me by turning a desk lamp off, where I had my fist instead of light bulb, or ''Human body resistance to heat'' when my mom caught me doing what she described as ''cooking my hand''.

and a suicide, though I prefer to call it seppuku, suicide has such a bad connotations in western culture.

I tried as a teenager, I made a plan that wouldn't implicate anybody, and I wouldn't be found or interrupted, than I tried, but it did not work. I tried to freeze to death, I though naked winter time at -30°C in a forest would guarantee that, I lasted 2 days and hunger made me change my mind and go back. That left me puzzled, but I used it to convince myself that obviously it wasn't my time. 

Since then i had recurring thoughts about doing it again, my life isn't exactly going well, just fighting for survival. But I recognise those thoughts now and fight them before I get to making a plan. 

Only you have the power to do it either way, so convince yourself you hacve a reason. Here are those i use:

Don't give them (them=NTs)  satisfaction by proving them right. I heard olften that I will come up to nothing good or end up in mental asylum from family and strangers throughout my childhood.. Being stubborn helped me in this one.

If you have a partner and/or kids you have an obligation to them to persevere after all they are our choice in our life. No longer an option for me.

I want to see how the world will turn out, what else humans will invent.

Things I want to learn, that requires time.

Things and places I want to see.

I want to get my pension for which i have been paying taxes. Otherwise i would be complicit in goverment and pension funds running scam on people by taking their money and not paying anything in r.eturn

You can make arguments both ways, The choice is yours, i wish you good luck.