Hello from a desperate mum!

hello Tori. Your message though short speaks volumes to me , I understand what you are going through. I have had the same thing with my 13yr old who has only just been recognised as being ASD. For all these years I have been seeking help and I can't tell you the living hell it has been in our home. Because my daughter is so very good at concealing her behaviour,  nobody would believe me, not even family or friends, let alone professionals to whom I have asked for help over the years. This is an extremely lonely and vulnerable place to be as a parent and my heart goes out to you. But please, be thankful that you have your diagnosis relatively early so you have a good chance of a more positive parenting experience, without the self doubt and the judgemental attitudes I have experienced  ( well it's obviously a problem in the home because it only happens in the home..). this, for me was the worst part of this journey so far, as I am a conscientious person and have tried my best to parent this child who meets me with opposition, abuse and violence at every turn. I have two children younger than her and they are so very different, without them I would not know the joy of parenting.  My family has also been at breaking point many times, it is absolutely exhausting dealing with it. I do not know if I can offer you advice at this stage on my journey but I can offer a shoulder from someone who knows, something I've never had and wished for many many times. You are not alone! It doesn't help in a practical sense but maybe because we are further along in years I may be able to offer something! I really wish I had known when my child was only 4, life could have been so different. I liken it to having been expecting her to run all these years when she didn't have any legs. We have to learn to parent in a different way now and that is going to be hard but I am hopeful this diagnosis although Pete is a positive step towards having the best home life we can try for, instead of beating ourselves up as parents wondering where we are going wrong. 

hello Tori. Your message though short speaks volumes to me , I understand what you are going through. I have had the same thing with my 13yr old who has only just been recognised as being ASD. For all these years I have been seeking help and I can't tell you the living hell it has been in our home. Because my daughter is so very good at concealing her behaviour,  nobody would believe me, not even family or friends, let alone professionals to whom I have asked for help over the years. This is an extremely lonely and vulnerable place to be as a parent and my heart goes out to you. But please, be thankful that you have your diagnosis relatively early so you have a good chance of a more positive parenting experience, without the self doubt and the judgemental attitudes I have experienced  ( well it's obviously a problem in the home because it only happens in the home..). this, for me was the worst part of this journey so far, as I am a conscientious person and have tried my best to parent this child who meets me with opposition, abuse and violence at every turn. I have two children younger than her and they are so very different, without them I would not know the joy of parenting.  My family has also been at breaking point many times, it is absolutely exhausting dealing with it. I do not know if I can offer you advice at this stage on my journey but I can offer a shoulder from someone who knows, something I've never had and wished for many many times. You are not alone! It doesn't help in a practical sense but maybe because we are further along in years I may be able to offer something! I really wish I had known when my child was only 4, life could have been so different. I liken it to having been expecting her to run all these years when she didn't have any legs. We have to learn to parent in a different way now and that is going to be hard but I am hopeful this diagnosis although Pete is a positive step towards having the best home life we can try for, instead of beating ourselves up as parents wondering where we are going wrong.