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I'm new and desperate for help

Tired mummy
over 8 years ago

Hi I'm a mum of 3 and I am loosing my mind, I don't really no where to start and explain why I am here.My 3 year old daughter is autistic However undiagnosed as of yet, my assessor keep putting her physiological testing back,  in one year I have had one consultation I am going out of my mind as I need the correct help.I don't know how to cope with it anymore she barely  sleeps,  (4-5 hours per night) if I'm lucky,  she pushes all boundaries which ain't too ridiculous,  she screams and cries if she cannot get her own way eg: taking away scissors or acting on impulses that would seem dangerous to a normal person.  She has no sense of danger and bolts when my back is turned,  she will repeat words or sounds over and over again,  she hits me and is violent towards her siblings (8 and 1) I can't tell her off as she will just laugh at me not understanding what she is doing.This is just the tip of the iceburg and I'm struggling to understand how she ticks.... Please from a desperate mother how can I get a diagnosis quicker, the father has a better understanding as the paternal grandmother has autism and has grown up with it. I feel like a failure and need someone to talk to who would understand 

  • over 8 years ago

    my daughter was diagnosed with Autism when she was four and has very similar signs to your daughter. She also has sleep problems and has no sense of danger and has no awareness of people around her. its difficult and i completly understand where you are coming from. As to why your daugters assessments have been delayed i have no idea but i do know how difficult it is. We took our doughter to the doctors about her sleep patterns and the doctor prescribed Melatonin a natural sleep remedy. it is normally naturaly produced by the brain to regulate sleep but is available in medicinal form. this maybe helpful for her sleep. As for her behavoural issues im afraid its trial and error to find out what triggers the behaviour and find  ways to avert her attention. maybe a toy or movie she can settle down to. Co morbidities are additional sympoms which can occur with Autism and ADHD is one of them which could explain the violent behaviour or it could be a symptom of a sensory overload or any number of things. it is so difficult to determine the exact cause of the behaviour and untill you get a professional diagnosis it is trial and error. Have you been to see your doctor to try and speed things up? If you have a Wowcher account there is an Autism awareness course for £20 and is detailed and will explain all your queries.


  • over 8 years ago

    Hi Tired mummy,


    I'm sorry to hear about the situation your family are currently going through. In terms of getting a diagnosis, the following link provides further information on this:

    http://www.autism.org.uk/about/diagnosis/children.aspx


     

    You may also want to look at our section that provides advice for parents, relatives and carers of people with autism.
    http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/parents-relatives-and-carers.aspx


    Regarding your daughter's behaviour, people on the autism spectrum disorder can often display behaviour that may be challenging. There will generally be a reason for this and it is important to try and understand the trigger for the behaviour when developing strategies. Please see the following link for more information on behaviour and strategies:

    http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour.aspx



    Finally, the Autism Helpline can provide you with information and advice on your issue. You can call them on 0808 800 4104 (Monday to Thursday 10am to 4pm, Friday 9am to 3pm), although please note that the Helpline is experiencing increasingly high demand, and you may not reach them straight away.


    Please see the following link for further information:  

    http://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main.aspx


    If you have any further questions please don't hesitate to get in touch,


    Best wishes,


    Nellie-Mod

  • over 8 years ago

    Hi Tired mummy,

    First of all - you're not a failure.  You can't be blamed for struggling to understand a mindset that's wired differently from yours.  It's often a very difficult thing to understand and to cope with.  Autism is most often inherited, so it sounds as if it's come down the paternal grandmother's side.  Does the father exhibit any similar behaviours?

    I can't offer much help, I'm afraid, in terms of getting a quicker diagnosis.  But I can suggest a book that might be helpful for you in your situation. There are cheap copies available (under a pound) on Amazon Marketplace.

    Susan Senator - Making Peace With Autism

    www.amazon.co.uk/.../1590303822

    I wish you well.  I'm sure you'll get plenty of good help and advice from other people on the forum.

    Tom