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Have I missed the boat?

L8588
over 8 years ago

Hi 

I'm a single mother to three children. The eldest child has ADHD and the second has just been diagnosed with ADHD and ASD. He is 11, but everything that I read is aimed at much younger children. For example, the 'Early Bird Plus' is supposed to be aimed at older children, but stops at age 8! What kind of help is there available to KS3 children?

I feel that I have completey failed my son because he should have received some kind of therapy years ago. Can anyone advise what (if any) help will be available to him at High School. He basically does anything anyone will tell him to, and once the bullies work this out I dread to think what will happen to him. I'm so fearful of letting him go to High School in Sep without any kind of support. 

Parents
  • over 8 years ago

    I am not a parent, I am a child who has had evident symptoms of and was diagnosed with AS at age 4. So while this may not be from the parental perspective I hope I can help by telling you what sort of things my parents did. I'll skip the really early stuff and go from age 10 up.

    The one thing I can't recommend enough is to try to find a qualified child counsellor. I went through two or three before we found one I liked, but once we did it helped a lot - particularly as I went into my teens. If the school he's going to has a counsellor or similar I also recommend he tries them too, as they specialise in school related matters both for working and socialising. It may take some time and it will probably be very annoying for both of you (it certainly was for me and my mum) but I found it very helpful.

    And second I'd just advise to be open-minded and maybe talk to someone yourself about caring for an autistic child. While having a professional for support outside of the home is valuable it is very important that your son have support at home, I have no idea what you've done so far, nor any of the specific needs of your child but it is invaluable and if you are already doing so then really do your best to try and preserve it. I pushed my mum away because I thought she was getting on my back too much and ended up regretting it later on so maintaining a solid relationship is just some advice.

    This probably wasn't worded the best but it's what I have so I hope it helped. Best of luck to you!

Reply
  • over 8 years ago

    I am not a parent, I am a child who has had evident symptoms of and was diagnosed with AS at age 4. So while this may not be from the parental perspective I hope I can help by telling you what sort of things my parents did. I'll skip the really early stuff and go from age 10 up.

    The one thing I can't recommend enough is to try to find a qualified child counsellor. I went through two or three before we found one I liked, but once we did it helped a lot - particularly as I went into my teens. If the school he's going to has a counsellor or similar I also recommend he tries them too, as they specialise in school related matters both for working and socialising. It may take some time and it will probably be very annoying for both of you (it certainly was for me and my mum) but I found it very helpful.

    And second I'd just advise to be open-minded and maybe talk to someone yourself about caring for an autistic child. While having a professional for support outside of the home is valuable it is very important that your son have support at home, I have no idea what you've done so far, nor any of the specific needs of your child but it is invaluable and if you are already doing so then really do your best to try and preserve it. I pushed my mum away because I thought she was getting on my back too much and ended up regretting it later on so maintaining a solid relationship is just some advice.

    This probably wasn't worded the best but it's what I have so I hope it helped. Best of luck to you!

Children
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