son being referred

hi im new here i have a 3 yr old son and im just going through him being referred for possible ASD, so im not sure if i should be here yet or not i guess i just need someone to talk to. i noticed my son had trates since he was 2yrs but i work with SEN children and thought perhaps i was reading to much into things after all he was still only a baby so i didnt really think any more but then a few weeks ago his childminder came to me with the same trates i had notcied and said what i had been thinking. i contacted the health vistitor and she came to see us, my childminder wrote a statment about my son for her to read which i will now post.

RE: LEVI  I have cared for Levi for a couple of years now since January 2013, I have noticed over the time I have cared for him various behaviours that have caused both Kelli and I to be concerned enough to ask for medical advice. Levi seems to struggle to read other people's ‘boundaries’, body language and process what they are saying, if he has it in his head that he needs/ wants to do something. For example he might want to stroke another child’s face, they may find it strange and cower away or even cry, he doesn't seem to be able to notice their body language and will carry on, even if they say no, clearly and repetitively. Although, he will sometimes notice that other children or adults are upset and then want to give them hugs and kisses and comfort them. Levi is very energetic, he is always on the go, he struggles to maintain interest in things that don't interest him and will go to find something he finds stimulating, he doesn't pay much interest to things he isn't interested in, but when he finds something he likes he becomes enthralled and obsessed with it, for example spider man, he loves spider man things, much of his conversation through the day will contain Spider-Man. If he sees anything with spider man on it, he will say it's his, even if he knows another child has brought it to the setting and he will try to get it and walk around with it, if he sees a child out and about wearing a Spider-Man coat or anything, he will ask them if he can have it! Levi will talk to anyone, he thinks that anyone who acknowledges him (child or adult) is his friend, he has no fear of strangers and will try to hug/ kiss/ hold hands with anyone that says hello back to him or even smiles at him. As well as Levi being very active, I have noticed that he fiddles with things a lot, he finds it extremely hard to sit still or quietly for any short length of time unless it's doing something he finds extremely interesting. He also constantly talks and his speech will often be very repetitive, he likes to confirm what is happening now and what is happening next and later, if it isn't what he expects to happen he can get very upset. Levi will interrupt constantly if people are speaking, he finds it hard to wait to say what he wants to and will repeat himself until acknowledged. Levi is easily distract by his surroundings, he can have trouble focussing on what you are saying and will often only hear either the first or the last part, even when repeated. When we are (for example) going past the local shops, Levi will repeat constantly his experiences of visiting the shops and will do this every single time we pass the shops, even if it's 4/5 times a day and he repeats in the exact same words, eg “ chip shop, no pennies sarah for chips, that shop (greengrocer) I want a nana (banana), got hair cut sarah, me got lollipop (hairdressers)”. Levi needs observing when playing as he can be quite rough on other children, he will pinch, pull, hit, hair pull, kick etc. this seems to be something he does for various reasons, he seems to do it if a child has a toy he may want, if he is bored, if he wants to cuddle or kiss a child and they reject him. I have noticed Levi can struggle to contain his emotions, he is a very emotional little boy, his emotions seem to go to the extremes, for example when he is happy, he's on top of the world, if he is upset, it's like the world has ended. It is hard to explain in words. I also feel Levi does struggle with his emotions at times and will have meltdowns, where he will hit/ kick or just completely breakdown and sometimes the only thing you can do is give him space to calm downers like he is in a bubble and afterwards he needs lots of reassurance. Levi is very impulsive and he seems to HAVE to follow through with his impulses else this can lead to him having a meltdown. Levi struggles with turn taking and sharing a lot of the time. He can be very good with sharing sometimes and can be very empathetic. He seems to ‘feel’ his emotions more deeply than other children.

This sums my boy upto a tee, but there are other things he is very over freindly with strangers to the point that if someone he walks past in the street looks at him he will try to go cuddle/kiss this person telling them he loves them and they are his best friend. it doesnt matter how many times i talk to him about strangers nothing sinks in. i have to think how i talk to him as for example playing in the garden a few weeks ago my mum said to him when a plane went over ohhh look quick lets hide a plane is coming, he now wont play in the back garden as he thinks a plane is going to get him but will go in other ppls and in the front as it didnt happen there. if i said today as he had a lolly that he had dropped on the carpet and got hairs on, dont eat it mummy needs to wash it first so he put it in the dishwasher as i had said it needed washing not that it needed rinsing. he doesnt sleep very well also he is potty trained but wont poo in his potty he has to have a nappy on. his melt downs last for hrs as he cant seem to bring himself round. i filled out a developmental questionair form the HV on social and emotional and the top score for a child his age should be 59 his was 90. anyway sorry for the long long post these are just a few things i dont no if ASD will be our outcome or not but just needed some advice i guess :)