Hi everyone. I’m really glad to have found this community. I’m not diagnosed yet (I’m on the NHS waiting list), but I’m fairly sure I’m autistic.
I struggle a lot with communication, especially conversation — small talk and back‑and‑forth exchanges are really hard for me. My executive functioning isn’t great either: multitasking is challenging, and I get overwhelmed when I have more than a few things to manage at once. I tend to have good attention to detail, but I find it difficult to see the “bigger picture.” I’ve also been anxious for as long as I can remember, and I’ve been having more frequent depressive episodes. From what I’ve read recently, these episodes seem very similar to autistic burnout.
I’m 45, and I only started exploring autism about two years ago after a therapist suggested it. At first I was excited — it felt like I finally had an explanation for all the things that seemed “different” about me, and I hoped to meet people who functioned in a similar way. But I quickly realised how diverse autistic experiences are. Sometimes I feel just as different from other autistic people as I do from neurotypical people. It’s fascinating and frustrating at the same time. I wonder if anyone else has felt this way.
Anyway, it’s nice to meet you all.
