Yes? No?
When?
I gotta say, I hit a wall. I had a weird (not amazing) conversation with my folks this past summer, where my mother made some comments and threw the "r-word" around and it made me feel exceedingly self-conscious about stimming in public beyond basic fidgeting. Anything more (rocking, tapping, flapping) and I don't even feel comfortable doing it by myself anymore. Self acceptance is great until you don't really know what you're accepting anymore. I never used to stim quite so openly, because I was so hyperactive, it just got all mixed in with the movement, so it never stood out. Now, I'm an adult, sitting in a rolling chair, trying not to rock and it's making me...kinda depressed.
it hits hard when I don't feel comfortable stimming, but also don't feel comfortable slapping labels on myself willy nilly, so I just exist in that uncomfortable state in between allistic and itchy all the time. But every time I think about stimming publicly, I hear that fun "r-word" again, and I feel awful.
How do y'all deal with it?
