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new and a lil scary

curiouslyweird7x

i recently was diagnosed last year as an 32 year old woman and it’s felt so isolating and lonely. it’s like you spend your whole entire life feeling misunderstood to then have all the answers and not know what to do with it or anyone to share it all with. is this normal after a diagnosis? :/

  • Hello and welcome.

    Yes, very definitely yes!  I was diagnosed a couple of months ago and am still working through what that means.  As Oscar did, I spent some time looking back and reviewing old events.  Then, as for Oscar, I realised that I could not change the past, but at least I could understand it a little better.  Finally, and most important for me, I realised that I was still exactly the same person as before, but now I was armed with more knowledge, insight, if you will, about what makes me tick.

    Sharing?  This is intensely personal; only you can make that decision, and only you will know when and if that is right.  I am just starting to tell a small group of friends now, and so far it has not been the drama I was expecting.  

    So, take whatever time you need to adjust, and most importantly, be kind to yourself.

  • Hi Curiously… welcome here, I hope you enjoy the forum. Your experience doesn’t sound unusual, but I hope with time things will settle for you. 

  • Hi and welcome, 

    Congratulations upon your diagnosis. You have described, very nicely, what many people feel immediately after their diagnosis. So, it does appear quite normal and it certainly happened to me. A diagnosis is so much more than a piece of paper and took me months to get to grips with. 

    You have found this site where many people have gone through this stage. So, you are not as isolated or lonely as you were. It may be worth looking at some of the messages from other people regarding "just been diagnosed". 

    Even after several months I am finding new aspects to my diagnosis.  I will wonder why do I always do this or say that, etc. and then I realise it is just part of my autism. After 70 years there is a lot make sense of.  Just after my diagnosis I did spend some time looking at my past. Then I realised it was fruitless as it wouldn’t change anything. I found looking to the future much more helpful and enjoyable. 

    The general advice to people just diagnosed is simply to take your time and be kind to yourself.

    Best wishes,
    Oscar 

  • Hi Curiouslyweird7x,

    Welcome to the online community and thank you for sharing. 

    I am glad you have received your diagnosis. Receiving an autism diagnosis can be an intense emotional experience and people report a wide range of reactions, which often change over time. You can read more about this on our How will I feel after receiving an autism diagnosis page. I hope this will help you and the responses from the community as they respond. 

    Best wishes, 

    Alice Mod