Its all new to me

At 48 I have just been diagnosed with ASD.

I've felt relief and overwhelmed at the same time

I want to learn all about myself. Previously diagnosed with several labels. Bi Polar, EUPD, dependant, GAD. Now I believe iv'e just been Autistic all along. With anxiety and depression.

Everything I Google ( like I cant drink water without juice, a sensory issue and things not even looked at in the assessment) and Google replies yes yes yes. 

Struggling for most of my life. I do believe though as a Christian I am not a mistake and it's possible to live a Happy life.

No one is defined by a diagnosis, but instead it explains that people who are like me just don't fit into a cynical, fast paced, pressured world. But being different is a super power.

What do you think?

Parents
  • Hi Rainbow

    I'm 49 and was diagnosed a few months ago. I was also brought up as Christian and still go to church, although my faith is shaky at best at the moment (but not because of my diagnosis!).

    You're absolutely right about not being defined by a diagnosis. I know it's a bit of a cliché now but "if you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person!" - in other words, no two of us are alike even though we share some traits with each other.

    I've been doing a lot of reading into autism lately and am happy to recommend some books that might help. Some of these are heavier going than others!

    • Why Can't I Just Enjoy Things?: A Comedian's Guide to Autism by Pierre Novellie - a fun and light-hearted read that also delves into quite a few of the more common comorbidities
    • The Chimp Paradox: How Our Impulses and Emotions Can Determine Success and Happiness and How We Can Control Them by Steve Peters - not a book about autism at all but a helpful way of thinking about our brains and how they function, particularly the emotional side of things
    • Incognito: The Secret Lives of the Brain by David Eagleman - a more in-depth look at the brain and how it works. Again, not specific to autism but there are some helpful insights
    • NeuroTribes by Steve Silberman - a complete history of autism from its initial discovery right through to the present day, including where a lot of the misinformation and misconceptions came from and how they're gradually being corrected

    Although being autistic doesn't make us expert psychologists by any means, once you know more about it you do start to spot tell-tale signs and traits in other people, and you realise there are almost certainly more autistic people around than anybody previously acknowledged. I liken it to "gaydar" - being able to spot a fellow autistic brain!

    And that has also made me think about the life of Jesus as depicted in the gospels. He demonstrated some tell-tale autistic traits; "black-and-white thinking" (Matthew 12:30), possibly an autistic meltdown (Matt 21:12-13 / Mark 11:15-18), withdrawing from crowds (Mark 3:7 among others). We are in good company!

  • Thanks so much for the recommendations. That's interesting about Jesus. He was happy to be different. I like how Simon in The series The Chosen Has a physical disability and Matthew is autistic. Showing that Jesus was and is inclusive and looks at our hearts and gifts and doesn't judge us by difficulties. He embraces uniqueness. And we have ppl still following trends or famous ppl on how to think, dress and be. We were meant to all be different. In terms of shaky in your faith. God understands why we struggle. I've had times of feeling so sad I struggle so much and have done all my life. And there's a loss to grieve. Especially with a new diagnosis. If only I'd known. But I do think it's a positive thing. I've had times of rebellion with God; from hurt and impatience. Doing things my way lol which never works. So God has grace for times when we have  been shaky . He is always there when we return to him. Whatever reason for u. He is full of compassion. 

  • Thank you, I really needed to hear that today.

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