Hey everyone

I felt a weird mix of relief and whiplash too, like someone finally handed me the cheat codes after I’d already played half the game on hard mode. What helped me was slowing the pace a bit and giving myself room to unlearn old habits that were draining me. Talking with folks who get it made things less heavy, so you’re definitely not the odd one out here.

I was diagnosed on Thursday so I feel pretty much like you..what next.  

Hi and welcome.

My diagnosis has been the best thing to happen and also the worst.

It is best because I now have an answer to what was 'wrong' with me as I always felt different but did not know why. I struggled with social situations and these were extremely difficult in work. I think I can relate it to dealing with a large group of children who can do no wrong! So now I could say 'hey it's not me but my autism that makes these thing different' and ask for help and support with reasonable adjustments at work.

That leads neatly to the worst!! Due to me requiring reasonable adjustments and asking for them, I was refused, removed from my role in a field I had spent over 30 years studying and working in and told to find another role in the organisation (public sector / healthcare)

I am now only weeks away from my employment tribunal hearing, which is costing a fortune.

So thats me on the scrap heap in my fifties, no chance of resuming my career elsewhere due to travel anxiety and the lack of equivalent roles elsewhere. It is a small market where the managers all talk, so who is going to hire me.

I have been fighting this for 3 years and I am so so tired and just want an answer (the uncertainty is killing me).

I have heard similar stories from many folks on here during that time.

I know there are good employers and managers out there but not in my profession.

Best of luck

I'm okay thanks, hope you're well too 

I mostly worked in accounting roles, but had a couple of breaks from that - once to work as a special needs teaching assistant, then later to teach English as a second language.

I also would often be misunderstood, and I changed jobs a lot. I'm so happy to be retired now.

Thank you and best wishes. Hope youre keeping well?!

HiKellyann82 and welcome 

I am late diagnosed and still learning about myself, I don’t think I would’ve been able to get through this without my therapist being there to support me. 

This place has been really helpful for getting answers from people who have been through similar experiences.

Wishing you well

Hi Kelly, welcome to the community. How are you feeling after receiving your diagnosis? I was diagnosed last year and a grand old age of 44. Been a little bit of a roller coaster since then but as Lotus said it does bring some understanding. For me it’s the diagnosis certainly helped me to understand myself better and helped to bring some clarity. Like you I’m hoping for brighter days in the future

I tend to ruminate on some of the bad experiences less than I did -I can appreciate say, that friendships have always been difficult as I'm so socially awkward which makes me seem weird, or that when I feel uncomfortable in certain situations, it's because I have sensory sensitivities. Being able to name it is really helpful.

I took some time out of work due to burn out last year, finding a way back that's right for you is important. I haven't disclosed to them, my current role doesn't have too much I can't manage, but being comfortable with the person you report to makes a big difference I think.

Welcome! 

Hey Lotus

Thank you for replying. Can I ask what you done for work? I was a bricklayer but I couldn't get on socially with colleagues. I would often be disliked or misunderstood. 

I had been struggling for so long I lost interest in hobbies and interests. All except bricklaying. But ive lost that too now. 

Im trying to rebuild my life now.

Thank you for taking the time to reply. I can relate. For me its an overwhelming sense of relief and understanding. Also the medication works really well for me. So I must be one of the lucky ones. 

Are you doing better now you have an understanding of what was going wrong?

I'm keen to go back to work but am apprehensive as I've had a lot of problems in the past.

Best wishes to you

Hi and welcome to the community. I'm a woman in my mid sixties and retired, and I enjoy reading and playing video games.

I self discovered that I was on the spectrum around 9 years ago. The knowledge does eventually bring some understanding, and sometimes ways to.mitigate overload.

Hey, welcome Kellyann82!

It's good to hear your feeling good about the future. I didn't have too much in the way of grief or anger when I got diagnosed last year, just relief and understanding that I am  different, it's not imagined, and if I find things harder than others, there is a reason for it.

I'm still working on trying to make some of those things a little easier, but I think finding out about autism helped give me language to talk about it, and above all, other people to share it with that get it. 

I hope you can get on well here!