I was recently unofficial identified as autistic by a psychologist during a mental health needs assessment. I've noticed my autism ebs and flows over time. Sometimes I feel paralyzingly autistic, have meltdowns, sounds feel intolerably painful, and I can't stand how uncomfortable I feel to the point it severely impacts my mental health. Othertimes, I genuinely don't feel autistic at all. I socialize all day without crashing, can handle my sensory environment, etc. Othertimes I unmask and deep dive into my special interest and become "researcher autistic". Does anyone elses autism feel so different at different times? In comparison, my ADHD feels the same every day. The things that are difficult for me are always difficult for me. Maybe my frame of reference is off? Or maybe I'm sub-clinically autistic?
Does anyone else feel this way? Is this normal? What does autism feel like for you guys?
I've also noticed that the more I support myself and am accomidated, the less autistic I feel. Sensory supports makes socializing easier, masking doesn't feel nearly as burdensome. Is this normal?
