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Do i keep trying with College attendance.

M_Guest71.

Hi All

I've just joined as I'm feeling lost as to what to do.  My daughter was diagnosed with autism 3years ago.  She completed her 1st year in College with minimum disruption and really enjoyed the course (Fashion and Design BTech level 3). The start to her second year was difficult due to last-minute changes, and she ended up taking a year out due to burnout and being overwhelmed.  The College were supportive and agreed to the year out, and she started her 2nd year this September.  She has a learning support plan, although it feels like a piece of paper with things written on it, rather than something to help her.

She managed the 1st 3 weeks really well, then started to struggle with being overwhelmed, executive function and getting started in the mornings.  I have now left work to support her through the next 6 months as she really wants to finish the course and go to University.  She's already been offered 2 University places, which she is pleased about.  At the moment, she is experiencing shutdown, has become non verbal, needs support to eat and drink and with self-care and is sleeping for approx. 16 hrs a day.  I have been liaising with the College, but with little response.

I have just sent the following to College:

I feel it is time to update xxxxx learning support plan to reflect her current difficulties with anxiety, sensory overload, and executive dysfunction, which have resulted in autism shutdown.  I would ideally like to schedule a meeting before the end of the Christmas term, if possible, to explore the reasonable adjustments the College can make to support her with neurodiversity and mental health.

 
I would ask that the following be considered:
 
Reasonable Adjustments for Attendance

Can the College formally adjust the attendance requirements, especially when xxxxxx autism makes structured daily attendance difficult?  This could include:

  • remote learning
  • alternative supervised sessions
  • adapted timetables
  • reduced presence on campus
  • arranged 1:1 or quiet-room study
  • extensions or flexible deadlines
  • absence exemptions - documented, disability-related absences marked as "exempt" rather than "absent" on registers.
  • online/hybrid participation options when possible to ensure access to course content when physical attendance is difficult.

Special Consideration for Final Grades

I'm not aware that xxxxxx has missed a deadline or assessment, and this requirement may not need to be considered if the above can be implemented and improves her attendance. However, if she continues to experience difficulties, would the College consider applying for special consideration from the awarding body?

It's painful watching my daughter trying to get into College, I practice low-demand parenting to reduce any pressure, but I'm stuck between her goal to get to Uni and the reality of what is currently 65% attendance.  The College are predicting Distinctions accross the board, so she can do the work.  I'll push the College for the above, but if she still can't make it in, what happens next?  

Does the above sound reasonable to anyone?  Can anyone share their experience of difficulties with College that might help me?  Also, any practical advice re supporting her through a shutdown and how long it will last would be appreciated.

Thanks, Michaela

Parents

  • Hi Michaela,

    Thank you for reaching out to the online community, is is always great to have new people joining our community. I am Olivia one of the online community moderators. 

    It sounds like your daughter is going through a really difficult time and you are doing an amazing job trying to support her. It can be hard to know what the best next steps can be but I am hoping our community can help you come up with some ideas.

    In terms of what the college can do to support your daughter better I have included some links to our advice and guidance pages that could be worth taking a look at:

    Extra help at school

    Transitions

    Disability discrimination in further and higher education 

    I can Iain has already helpfully signposted you towards out information on meltdowns- which includes about shutdowns. Shutdowns length can vary from person to persons, some may only last a few hours and others last much longer. Some of our guidance talks about how autistic people can help manage feelings of anxiety, it could be helpful in terms of reducing feelings that can trigger shutdowns so I have included it:

    Below are some general tips and guidance from autistic people and professionals that you might want to try. 

    Understand the triggers

    Keep a diary to help identify when you are anxious, and what might make it worse.  

    Monitor and manage your energy levels

    Be aware of your energy levels after social interactions and other events/situations that you may find tiring or difficult.  Recharge by taking time for yourself and doing things you enjoy. 

    Make the environment work 

    Make adaptations to the environment where possible, for example lower unnatural light if too harsh. 
    Try noise-cancelling headphones to reduce sensory overload.  

    Self-soothe

    Use sensory tools and stimming to reduce anxiety levels, if that works for you.

    Relaxation and calming activities 

    Try relaxation methods such as meditation, mindfulness, yoga and exercise.  

    Visual schedules

    Visual schedules to help structure the day and reduce uncertainty within your day.

    Use an app

    The following app offers personalised support with anxiety.

    Molehill Mountain – includes: 

    • a system for tracking mood and identifying triggers
    • evidence-based tips on how to self-manage anxiety levels.

    I hope some of this is helpful and wish you and your daughter the best,

    Olivia Mod

Reply

  • Hi Michaela,

    Thank you for reaching out to the online community, is is always great to have new people joining our community. I am Olivia one of the online community moderators. 

    It sounds like your daughter is going through a really difficult time and you are doing an amazing job trying to support her. It can be hard to know what the best next steps can be but I am hoping our community can help you come up with some ideas.

    In terms of what the college can do to support your daughter better I have included some links to our advice and guidance pages that could be worth taking a look at:

    Extra help at school

    Transitions

    Disability discrimination in further and higher education 

    I can Iain has already helpfully signposted you towards out information on meltdowns- which includes about shutdowns. Shutdowns length can vary from person to persons, some may only last a few hours and others last much longer. Some of our guidance talks about how autistic people can help manage feelings of anxiety, it could be helpful in terms of reducing feelings that can trigger shutdowns so I have included it:

    Below are some general tips and guidance from autistic people and professionals that you might want to try. 

    Understand the triggers

    Keep a diary to help identify when you are anxious, and what might make it worse.  

    Monitor and manage your energy levels

    Be aware of your energy levels after social interactions and other events/situations that you may find tiring or difficult.  Recharge by taking time for yourself and doing things you enjoy. 

    Make the environment work 

    Make adaptations to the environment where possible, for example lower unnatural light if too harsh. 
    Try noise-cancelling headphones to reduce sensory overload.  

    Self-soothe

    Use sensory tools and stimming to reduce anxiety levels, if that works for you.

    Relaxation and calming activities 

    Try relaxation methods such as meditation, mindfulness, yoga and exercise.  

    Visual schedules

    Visual schedules to help structure the day and reduce uncertainty within your day.

    Use an app

    The following app offers personalised support with anxiety.

    Molehill Mountain – includes: 

    • a system for tracking mood and identifying triggers
    • evidence-based tips on how to self-manage anxiety levels.

    I hope some of this is helpful and wish you and your daughter the best,

    Olivia Mod

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