• Replies 18 replies
  • Subscribers 77 subscribers
  • Views 454 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

My head's fell off....

onedego

Hi Community!  Hi Mods!  I thought I'd introduce myself.  I'm Andy!

My journey started a couple of years ago when my wife & I recognised signs of ADHD in our then 9 year old daughter.  We did the usual online questionnaires, and decided to go to our GP to get her checked out.  Low and behold, 12 months later paediatrician diagnoses her with Inattentive ADHD.  You know how things go, though - you're filling in these questionnaires and answering them for yourself - my answers were quite similar to hers...  Intrigued, off I went to our GP down the right to choose route - and 12 months later diagnosed with Combined ADHD - but the psychiatrist was also ASD Qualified, and told me there and then he thought I might be Autistic, and asked for me to be re-referred for that route.  I wasn't convinced.  Along came the questionnaires, and then the appointment (11 weeks after my ADHD diagnosis) - a different psychiatrist added Autism to my wrap sheet.  

My ADHD diagnosis I'd met with "nothing's changed, I'm 44 and I've made a pretty good career with it", but the Autism diagnosis has hit me HARD.  I think it's the combination of the two more than just Autism.  So my head's fell off completely - I'm feeling quite lost as I'm now looking back at 44 years of my life with masking, and wondering now what is mask, what is me?  I want to be able to unmask as much as possible, but it's hard when you don't know where you're masking.  Apparently, I'm supposed to be being referred for "therapy" to help me figure it out, but I'm not holding my breath at the moment as Mental Health services in my area are absolutely shocking.  Don't get me wrong, I'm looking back at those 44 years and certainly some stuff makes sense - friendships (or lack of), social awkwardness, day-dreaming, creative, struggled academically but amazing fact recall, ability to find answers where others can't, hugely logical mind (but also chaotic).  

So I guess for now I'm just going to have to try and figure it out myself...  What makes it worse is that I've spoken to a couple of people who I've known for up to 6 years and told them of my diagnosis and they replied "I thought you knew already?"

I'm not down, or depressed - just extremely confused and a little lost at the moment.  

Thanks for listening!

Parents

  • Hi Andy. Sounds like you are in the same boat as me. I went down the autism rabbit hole first though and have literally just got my diagnosis two days ago. They also suggested that it would be worth me getting assessed for ADHD.

    I waited a long time for my autism diagnosis so I feel like I had already fully accepted that I was autistic when I got diagnosed. I have felt quite emotional since diagnosis though. Autism is, to me, a really tricky one to get your head around. With ADHD, I feel like I have had plenty of moments in my life when I have glimpsed what it is like to not have it so it seems relatively clear to me what it would be like if it went away. With autism though, it is so tied in to my sense of self that it is very difficult for me to conceive of what life could possibly be like for someone who isn't autistic. I see the decisions and behaviours of some neurotypical people and I cannot even begin to imagine what thought process (if any!) led them to it.

    Reading and learning have really helped me in my acceptance. This forum has been invaluable for hearing other's experiences and being able to relate to them. There is so much information out there now and you will know what is relevant to you and what isn't. Good luck, and give yourself time to let it all sink in.

Reply

  • Hi Andy. Sounds like you are in the same boat as me. I went down the autism rabbit hole first though and have literally just got my diagnosis two days ago. They also suggested that it would be worth me getting assessed for ADHD.

    I waited a long time for my autism diagnosis so I feel like I had already fully accepted that I was autistic when I got diagnosed. I have felt quite emotional since diagnosis though. Autism is, to me, a really tricky one to get your head around. With ADHD, I feel like I have had plenty of moments in my life when I have glimpsed what it is like to not have it so it seems relatively clear to me what it would be like if it went away. With autism though, it is so tied in to my sense of self that it is very difficult for me to conceive of what life could possibly be like for someone who isn't autistic. I see the decisions and behaviours of some neurotypical people and I cannot even begin to imagine what thought process (if any!) led them to it.

    Reading and learning have really helped me in my acceptance. This forum has been invaluable for hearing other's experiences and being able to relate to them. There is so much information out there now and you will know what is relevant to you and what isn't. Good luck, and give yourself time to let it all sink in.

Children
No Data