I'm undiagnosed, formally, but I'm checking a lot of the boxes.
45 yo male - I've had a pretty "normal", rewarding and successful life but there have always been struggles. Socially especially - but also with inner dialogue and how I feel about myself and my general mental health. I've experienced depression, anxiety and addictions. These were things I've been able to overcome or manage but I've always felt "off".
At one point in my life I thought I was bi-polar, but I didn't quite fit the profile.
About 10 months ago I recorded a video of myself speaking to a camera. Recently (last few months) I rewatched that video for the first time. It was then that I made an interesting discovery - I did not look into the camera lens for more than a few seconds at a time. Did I do this with people too? Sure enough, when I started observing myself I noticed I could not look people in the eye for very long before it got really uncomfortable and I had to look away.
When I googled this it didn't take long for me to find answers. I took an online self-assessment and scored a 39/50.
This is a big deal and breakthrough for me. I'm taking it in pretty good stride because it provides answers to so many questions I've had for so long, and explains so many things I've wondered about all my life.
Not sure where I go next - I've reached out to see if I can arrange for a formal diagnosis, not only for validation but to provide direction and guidance.
Two of my "special interests" are woodworking, and metal working.
Looking forward to reading the accounts of others as well.
