Hi ! Nice to meet you all. Looking for some advice?

Hi domx17, good to have you here hope you get what you are looking for.

I just contacted my GP and she referred me. I’m in England - not Wales - so I’m not sure how it varies depending on region. I wouldn’t worry about the doctor thinking you’re ‘bonkers’ - hopefully they’re a bit more professional and insightful than that! And if they’re not……there’s not much you can do about that!

Hi again, I hope you don't mind me asking (I live in Wales so not sure if it's different where you live) but have I gone the correct route with getting assessed? I sent a self referral form to my health board who deals with autism assessments. Is it worth me trying to go to the GP and asking them for a referral? I'm constantly scared they won't believe me and think I am totally bonkers.. how did you go about getting assessed? 

Thanks! 

You’re welcome :) 

Hi ! Thank you so much for your reply. I feel much more comfortable after hearing your situation and your eldest sounds very much like the way I feel and dealing with the work side of life. I just hope my self referral gets accepted and looked into :( Also scared about if they invite me for an assessment in person, I won't be able to cope with an in-person assessment. I've been to the GP before about me feeling like there's something different and the way I cope and see life, to other people I don't "look" or "sound" that much like autism, so I'm thinking that I'm on the spectrum but low end. They've pushed me aside and failed me and say well it might be your energy levels, this and that.. and just generally push it aside. It's infuriating. That is why I've gone the self referral route, there is no way I will ever be able to go private either. 

Thanks again for the response! 

Hi - I think it’s often a gradual realisation for many of us. Initially my youngest son was diagnosed with Autism when he was about 10, then my eldest was diagnosed in his mid twenties, and then I was diagnosed relatively recently in middle age. As your sister is autistic I’m sure you are so familiar with all the autistic traits so I’d be very surprised if you’re not right about your own situation. Before my son was diagnosed I’d always felt ‘different’ and struggled with so many aspects of everyday life - but I just didn’t know why. Then once my youngest was diagnosed it started to dawn on me that I was autistic too. But it took me many years before I decided to get an assessment - because I wasn’t sure if it would make any positive difference to have one. However I’m glad I did go and get the diagnosis- I found it very validating and it’s sometimes been helpful to explain to people why certain things are more stressful for me. 
I think it’s good that you’re going to get an assessment - I hope it goes well for you. Regarding work: I think it can be so challenging for autistic people to find work that is suitable for them. My eldest did very well academically but when he left uni and went into the workplace he struggled to focus on work that had no meaning to him - he has a diagnosis of ADHD too btw. He found the social side of work really exhausting too - all the chit chat etc - which is a surprisingly significant element of being in a workplace. He’s now gone back into academic work again and is much happier in that environment. My youngest son has struggled much more and dropped out of college during the pandemic, and has never had a job. He has Selective Mutism so struggles a lot. However they are both wonderful people and have worked very hard to deal with so many challenges - and I am so proud of the people they are. I think as autistic people we need to acknowledge that it’s not easy for us, and not feel bad about the fact we can struggle a lot with many things. This community on here is so welcoming and supportive and it’s great to talk to people on here because they really understand what it’s like. Best wishes to you - and good luck with everything.

Welcome.

I wondered whether you might benefit from contacting a branch of the National Autistic Society in Wales. 

On the main menu, on the "What We Do" area; you can find a search box for "Branches". 

Currently, in Wales, there are 13 Branches listed (I hope within that list; you might locate a Branch in your area). 

I understand that you don't want to leave the house for anything.  I am not saying you ought to "attend a group", rather: why not try reaching out to a Branch?

Hi and welcome to the community!

Many of us here are "late realised" and/or "late diagnosed", so you're in good company! :)

Whilst the information that you've shared could be consistent with autism and/or ADHD - and ADHD can certainly co-occur with autism - we're not allowed to offer medical advice here, and the professionals involved in assessments also consider a lot of additional information.

If you haven't yet seen them, you might like to read through the various resources in the NAS's recently revamped diagnosis hub:

NAS - diagnosis hub

They cover all stages of the process for autism, with each section containing several articles relating to that stage:

• Before diagnosis
• Assessment and diagnosis 
• After diagnosis 

For example, these articles (from "Before diagnosis") would perhaps make for a particularly timely read:

NAS - Signs that a child or adult may be autistic

NAS - How to request an autism assessment

The NAS articles include links to some screening questionnaires that you might like to complete, to get a better idea of whether your suspicions might be correct. You might prefer to use the website below for this, rather than the versions linked in the NAS article.

The site provides some very useful commentary for each questionnaire, and also enables them to be completed online (with scores calculated for you), saved as PDFs and - if the results support your suspicions and you decide to seek a formal diagnosis - printed off to take with you to the GP.

For autism, the AQ-10 or AQ-50 seem to be the most frequently used / required by GPs in support of NHS referrals. (RAADS-R might also be helpful, although some recent research has thrown doubt on its validity as a screening tool). For ADHD, the ASRS v1.1 can also be used.

Embrace Autism - screening tests

You might also find the advice here helpful:

ADHD UK