Hello

We were told last year that my three year old son had autistic tendencies, we haven't had a diagnosis yet.  We met with the educational psychologist who recommended he attend the observation and assessment unit, which is a class for up to eight children with special needs with the staff trained to support and work with them.  Like you I was really anxious because my little boy has no speech and it took months to get him to settle in pre school even though he had 1 to 1 support there.  The staff in the unit were great, the first day he went for two hours, the second day for three hours and we built up until he was ready to go for a full day and after the first week he really surprised me, the staff in the unit recommended he go full time.

He's been there for almost two months now and he's settled really well, he's really happy there.  The only issue we have is when I drop him off he gets really upset so at the moment my father in law takes him to school and he's okay when he drops him off.

He went to a main stream pre school before he started in the unit and what I found was the staff didn't really understand my son or his needs.  We went to see the unit before my son was given a place there and we got to speak with the staff this allayed any fears and issues that we had, maybe this is something you could do before deciding on a school.

Thanks for your wise words re schooling choices. You are right, I would much prefer my son to be happy and learning in a way suitable for him as a visual learner . I will keep my options open and give the special needs school a chance. Going with my son to see it on Tuesday and then in may have a transition meeting at the local Mainstream school , will let you know what I decide. Thanks!

Hi rose,

Yes it is difficult for siblings. My son gets on well with his older sister ( she tends to be more silly and he seems to respond to her well) but with his sister who is 1.5 yr older he doesn't get on as well which breaks my heart because she is such a kind sensitive soul. Hopefully things will improve As he gets older. Today we went shopping and for the first time he held her hand which meant alot to her. Sometimes really small things like this make a huge difference!

I used to work in Glasgow and in crosshouse hosp in Kilmarnock. My Glasgow geography is bad now that I am living in England for 13 years

My son tends to speak alot but hardly anything recognisable! He shocked me recently at the child development centre when he pointed to a number and said the appropriate number! So there is hope

I am going to look at the special needs school on Tuesday so hopefully will get a good feeling about what is right for him

 Hi 

Ross has another year of nursery before he starts school next aug 15, I have alkready been looking around different special needs schools. i dont think its fair putting hiom through main stream, In Girvan(south west scotland)  where i live there is a special needs school. it looks great, its very small, only @20 pupils with different needs. but he will be in a class of four so will get plenty of help and they do so much for the kidz, swimming, horse riding, football etc. plus if he enjoys a particular subject ie art or something someone will go with him to the primary or secondary school and join in mainstream. it is so difficult to know what the best for your child. especially when you are trying to get your head around the diagnosis etc. Hope you find a school mainstream or special needs that suits your family too. its very difficult with the siblings as well, my oldest is quite upset at the moment because Ross isnt talking.. very hard for them.

Hi Rose

Meltdowns are one of the hardest things I've ever experienced.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason to them at the time but as my daughter has got older, we can usually find it eventually.

Kris - my daughter has only recently been diagnosed (at 13) but having been through a marvellous maintstream primary school and two high schools (we moved house), I think I'd always opt for a special school.  My daughter was really unlucky at primary - her class was full of high achievers (the highest they'd ever had) and with her additional learning difficulties, it really lowered her self esteem.  Her first high school wasn't so bad and if we'd stayed there, I think she'd have got through it.  It was a small school and she was in a small specialist class.  We moved and her current school (though she doesn't attend anymore) was a disaster despite claiming they have over 40 children on the spectrum etc etc.  I'm holding out for a special school now and although my daughter wouldn't technically get in on her learning disability, I have to put her mental health first.  I think you only need to get one or two teachers that don't get ASD and you are always going to struggle.

Hi Rose

my son was diagnosed as autistic recently. It has come as a shock as his 2 older sisters are ' normal'. He is so funny and a really sweet boy , occasionally will say the appropriate thing but it is very much on his terms. Hoping that he will chat soon.....

your son must be going to school in September like my son. I must admit I am anxious about it and don't know how he will cope especially as he says so little. I am looking around the special needs school for autism but don't know what to think. Part of me realises that perhaps it is better for him (smaller classes and more dedicated 1-1 time) and the other half of me thinks it will accepting 'less of him' than his sisters. Oh wish me luck!

let me know how you get on with our other son