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Family don't understand me

AdeleM

My parents are less than supportive with my autism. I’ve tried explaining how difficult it can be with processing things like change and going out but they don’t understand say I’m making excuses. It’s one of the reasons I’m trying to move out, I’m on a housing list so it’s only a matter of time.

I love both my parents and I’m grateful for all they have done for me but it hurts that they don’t try to understand me. I’ve sent them both autism related sites to help them better understand what it’s like but my mum said she didn’t have time to look and my dad said I just need to be stronger and believe in myself and then I’ll be able to do more. He’s really hoping I’ll get a job, I am looking and trying to find work but I want to get a job that won’t make my life worse as the last one I had caused burnout and I still haven’t fully recovered from it yet.

I have nobody who I know who really gets what it's like to be autistic.

Sorry for the vent this was meant to be an introduction, I do feel better for having written this though so I’m glad in a way. Just want to be understood and know that it’s ok to be the way I am.

  • in reply to AdeleM

    No, that is quite all right. I found it such a relief, knowing I was different but unsure why. I have enjoyed finding myself in the years since as I learn and read more about autism.  I would recommended a visit to the Autism show this summer. I went a few years back and there were stalls and talks on autism as well as being able to meet others on the spectrum. They also had a quiet room which I had to use from time to time.

  • in reply to LucyLandRover

    Hello! Thank you for replying.

    I’m so sorry you felt you had to leave home so early. Must have been such a difficult decision to make but I am very glad it worked out well for you in the end and you are now in your own place and love it. This is exactly what I am hoping for when I move out, I hope it will result in a much happier life for me.

    How did you find being diagnosed? Sorry for the personal question, feel free to ignore it. I just ask because I am 28 (only just) and I was recently diagnosed and read a lot of people feel life suddenly everything starts making sense but this hasn’t been my experience, so far. I might make a separate thread about this topic though.

    Thanks again.

  • Hello, 

    I left home when I was sixteen as the law allowed it back then. I was only diagnosed in my mid thirties but I hated the bad situation at home so had to get out. Like you, I have supplied autism information, links and books to no avail. Some family members only accept their version of autism and not mine. I live in my own home and love being independent. No, it is not always easy but I love being my own boss. I hope you do find a nice home of your own and are able to thrive.    

  • in reply to SpikeyMark

    I am so sorry for your loss x. I hope you are coping ok.

    Thank you. I have already recieved a lot of help from just one person, very grateful for that help and support today.

  • My parents are no longer here, but there are some other members here who have parents at various levels of non-acceptance. Ranging from ableism to downright denial.

    I hope that some of them can help you out.