Hey

Hi I’ve just joined this online community not really looking for any advice as I like to look everything up myself but I would love to be more social and have conversations with other people that just understand,
so I’m a single parent, all three of my kids are Sen, I’m waiting for an accessment for myself, I dont really get time away from my kids but I don’t want to go out the house and do stuff without them anyway, I have 3 friends that I’ve been friends with since school other then that I’m not good at meeting new people, sometimes I feel lonely but other times I’m glad I’m by myself because trying to keep a conversation going with strangers really overwhelms me, I don’t think il ever meet anyone romantically neither

Parents
  • Hi! I think I understand this paradox of feeling lonely but also lacking the energy to socialise.
    Good to have you here! 

  • Thank you both, how do you both deal with it?

  • Ah, okay. I mean, that’s a good start. I’m still quite spoiled when it comes to chores, because I’m only 18 and still live with my parents until I get my Abitur (German degree) in summer (and probably a bit longer… housing is expensive…). So I’m probably not really qualified to answer. But there are occasions when I have to do many “outside chores” and although my answer to the question “do I want to do that” would definitely be no, I still have to do them. Again, trying to accommodate myself is a mighty tool. Less visible earplugs, sunglasses, comfortable clothing. All things that help, but weren’t easy for me to include in my day since I always felt like, I didn’t “deserve” to use them, since I’m did not go through an assessment yet. 

    For the worries while being out… It’s difficult for me to fully understand your feelings, since I don’t have kids. But whenever I feel like I want to go home to my dog because he’s alone or anything, it helps me if I know exactly what I did to prepare the house for him. I have an exact routine for setting up the house before I leave (close some doors, go on a little walk with him shortly before leaving, filling up the water etc.) so I don’t have to worry as much. But I recognise that children are a completely different deal. Would it help you if you got updates from your mother via text message or call? Just to reassure you.

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  • Ah, okay. I mean, that’s a good start. I’m still quite spoiled when it comes to chores, because I’m only 18 and still live with my parents until I get my Abitur (German degree) in summer (and probably a bit longer… housing is expensive…). So I’m probably not really qualified to answer. But there are occasions when I have to do many “outside chores” and although my answer to the question “do I want to do that” would definitely be no, I still have to do them. Again, trying to accommodate myself is a mighty tool. Less visible earplugs, sunglasses, comfortable clothing. All things that help, but weren’t easy for me to include in my day since I always felt like, I didn’t “deserve” to use them, since I’m did not go through an assessment yet. 

    For the worries while being out… It’s difficult for me to fully understand your feelings, since I don’t have kids. But whenever I feel like I want to go home to my dog because he’s alone or anything, it helps me if I know exactly what I did to prepare the house for him. I have an exact routine for setting up the house before I leave (close some doors, go on a little walk with him shortly before leaving, filling up the water etc.) so I don’t have to worry as much. But I recognise that children are a completely different deal. Would it help you if you got updates from your mother via text message or call? Just to reassure you.

Children
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