Hello everyone - I’m seeking a bit of advice please!
My youngest son (who is autistic and in his early twenties) is living a very socially isolated life and he wants to change this. He also had selective mutism throughout his school life and dropped out of college during the pandemic. He has some online tutoring currently - and so doesn’t mix with anyone his own age at all. He finds the idea of talking to anyone outside the family extremely challenging, but he’s really intelligent, has a good sense of humour and is a lovely caring person - and I’m sure if he could build his confidence he would get on well in relationships with people - because he’s just so nice (I know mothers are biased but he really is such a good person and such great company).
The problem is: I am also autistic, and his dad has autistic traits (probably autistic) and we don’t have friends we see in person either. My son is expressing the wish to change his situation and tackle his social anxiety and actually find some friends and hopefully a girlfriend - but none of us have a clear idea about where to start. We live in a small village so there not a lot going on in our area as there would be in a city. My son is so anxious about talking to people that he can’t - for example - go in a shop and buy something from a cashier. He’s extremely nervous about talking to anyone other than close family. So it’s so difficult for him to get out of the situation he’s in and we don’t now how to start really.
So essentially I just want to ask if anybody has been in a similar situation and found a way to make progress with this. After years of selective mutism in school and then the pandemic my son’s confidence is very low and he is extremely intimidated at the idea of going somewhere and talking to people, but he’s unhappy at being so socially isolated and does have motivation in that sense. We get on very well as a family but of course he wants more than just being with his parents all the time - he wants a life and a girlfriend etc.
Any advice or idea you can share would be really appreciated. Thanks :)
