Published on 12, July, 2020
Hey so it says don't identify yourself. Ok so I'm Jeff (not my real name)
I finally got an ASD diagnosis after NHS said they could see me in 3 years. Paid my £1750 did lots of questions and meetings and I have been told I am autistic which I knew anyway I could tell them why I was just needed a bit of paper saying yes so I can get support.
I also wanted to get to coping strategies etc with how illogical people frustrate me amongst other stuff. Have had my symptoms masked somewhat probably by 2 decades in the military which the routine suited me perfectly.
Now I've finished and I'm out the world starts to unravel as I long for my nights alone and now living with wife and daughter. We are working out a plan though to figure things out.
I feel like there should be like conferences as a safe space to meet with others that are similar and have revelations to find out there are people who are very similar and look at the world in a similar world as I don't find them people in daily life or it's just simply quirky things that people don't discuss.
Jeff
Hi Jeff,
You will find a lot of people like you on here
I'm 45, been diagnosed about 3 months now after YEARS of feeling alien in this world. I have an anthology of oddities I could share including getting fking FURIOUS because everyone I knew loved the TV show Big Brother, despite it just being 8 adults living in a house; Spending a wedding alone in the carpark at night rather than mix with guests; Never enjoying a single holiday I've been on as they're just a series of activities I could have done at home, except somewhere else; and of course wanting to be dead because life is a joyless toil of pointless endeavour.
There are a multitude of other thoughts, feelings (lack of feelings) and experiences you may find similar to others. I hope you'll take comfort from them.
To tell you the truth I don't write on this forum as much as I would like to. I think part of the problem is a huge dislike of social media, possibly part of autism who knows. Which is a shame because I would love to get to know you more, because I genuinely feel the more times I hear from people and can share my experiences with people, the closer to feeling human I get.
Don't don't knock the piece of paper thoughts either, I remember doing the same thing about getting married. Like a lot of people I thought "we've been living together for five years, what's the point of getting a piece of paper to make it official". There is certainly a logical argument which backs this up, however I think there is a connection between all of lifes "pieces of paper" and autism.
Being autistic gives me the objectivity that my diagnosis is simply a piece of paper, decided upon by a couple of professionals who have spent a few years reading the words of other professionals, to arrive at an opinion, which is a mixture of other people's opinions. Blah blah blah - my autism makes me analytical and the cliché ASD Robot. But being human and part of this world is all about believing in these pieces of paper and allowing them to be a part of you - everything from a slip of paper saying "The bank of England promises to pay the bearer of this note £20" to an A4 certificate saying "Jeff's" a Normal Service Leaver from the British Army. They're all just pieces of paper, but all the pieces of paper go towards making us who we are.
Autism is a big enough part of you for you to recognise it and spend hard earned cash to have it defined. I'm proud of mine, it's one of the first things I tell people these days, it makes me feel better saying "I'm not quite like you, I may say or do things you find odd - but that's because you don't understand ASD". It's nice to know it's not my fault anymore.
Anyway - welcome Brother.
Thanks for sharing this resonates.
Having just found the notifications link on this website I starr to see new posts albeit ordering the responses to newest puts the responses to threads under those threads and not at the top of the list as I would expect
Makes me think this website wasn't designed by an autistic. Things like that amuse me in my own little view of the world.