Published on 12, July, 2020
My name is Felix, I'm 18 and I've been recently diagnosed with autism, though I've been suspecting it since I first learned what it was at 12.
I have lots of interests and hobbies I keep cycling through, but right now, as part of an interesting in painting, I have a bit of an obsession with observing how lighting affects the colour of plants during different times of day (my favourites are yellow leaves at sunrise and orange trees before sunset).
I've always found it more difficult than those around me to interact with people and this has only gotten worse with time. I'm currently trying to learn to understand people to the best of my ability and to improve my social skills, since I'd really like to connect with people and hold friendships for more than a year. Any tips or resources for that would be greatly appreciated :)
Hi Felix, First off, welcome to the community! I'm glad you've found us. I can definitely understand your interest in how lighting affects the colour of plants during different times of day. I'm very much the same, especially the changes of seasons when the colours of leaves begin to transition. It's a beautiful sight especially when the sunlight catches it at the right angles.
I can definitely understand where you're coming from. It can be really difficult to interact with people, especially if you feel like you're not good at it. But don't worry, there are definitely things you can do to improve your social skills.
One of the most important things is to be yourself. Don't try to be someone you're not, because people will be able to tell. Just be genuine and authentic, and people will be more likely to want to talk to you. In the past I've spent too much time trying to be like other people and it's never a good idea, it just adds to the masking and makes being social harder.
Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help. If you're struggling with social skills, there are plenty of resources available to you. You can talk to a therapist, counselor, or social worker. There are also many books and articles available on the topic of social skills, and online video tutorials as well.
It's something I struggle with and have tried to help myself with as well. I'm not always successful at being social unfortunately, even after practicing and reading up on it, but I do try.
I hope you will have better luck.
Thank you, that sounds like good advice! :D