• Replies 14 replies
  • Subscribers 68 subscribers
  • Views 4243 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

need help with accepting daughters have autism

boozy

i have 2 daughters 5 (diagnosed autism and LD's) in special school with statement and 14 (High Functioning Autism) in mainstream school on school action plus. I have only recently been up front and honest in saying to my family that i am struggling to accept the autism i've always been in denial. Every time they act say or do weird things it makes me cringe feel embarrased and i just want to run in the opposite direction. i feel shame and guilt at saying such things but i have to be honest. i am currently on anti depressants and awaiting psycholgical assistance. can anyone help me accept them for who they are i'm desparate as it's affecting all our lives.

Parents

  • Dear Boozy

    I have an autistic daughter and for the first 5 years of her growing up, I refused to accept completely that she was both autistic and "what had I done wrong!"...

    I had counselling which didn't go entirely to plan, but did enable me to see her firstly as my daughter and secondly that she was some-one that made me see the world differently. I heard a story once about a mother who described having an autistic child as planning to go somewhere on holiday but ending up somewhere completely different. This "different' sometimes is more difficult, strange and occasionally makes you wonder where you could have gone, but you can't go back to "the other place". Acceptance of your situation and your daughter who have autism is hard, mainly because other people expect a "norm" from all of you. I ended up on anti-depressants (ADs) not only because of my stressful domestic life but also because neither me or my daughter were good sleepers. She is now on Melatonin (a godsend!) and I have a low dose AD, because it helps me to get a good nights sleep to cope with every new day. I have days where her behaviour honestly drives me insane and I try to have to set boundaries (which don't always work), and I am grateful to have a very supportive and patient partner. 

    Lastly, I would recommend and excellent book which helped me and others who look after my daughter, written by an autistic child Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew. This is both heartbreaking and uplifting to read and should be compulsory to all parents, carers and family members. 

    Regards and goodwill,

    Hdan

Reply

  • Dear Boozy

    I have an autistic daughter and for the first 5 years of her growing up, I refused to accept completely that she was both autistic and "what had I done wrong!"...

    I had counselling which didn't go entirely to plan, but did enable me to see her firstly as my daughter and secondly that she was some-one that made me see the world differently. I heard a story once about a mother who described having an autistic child as planning to go somewhere on holiday but ending up somewhere completely different. This "different' sometimes is more difficult, strange and occasionally makes you wonder where you could have gone, but you can't go back to "the other place". Acceptance of your situation and your daughter who have autism is hard, mainly because other people expect a "norm" from all of you. I ended up on anti-depressants (ADs) not only because of my stressful domestic life but also because neither me or my daughter were good sleepers. She is now on Melatonin (a godsend!) and I have a low dose AD, because it helps me to get a good nights sleep to cope with every new day. I have days where her behaviour honestly drives me insane and I try to have to set boundaries (which don't always work), and I am grateful to have a very supportive and patient partner. 

    Lastly, I would recommend and excellent book which helped me and others who look after my daughter, written by an autistic child Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew. This is both heartbreaking and uplifting to read and should be compulsory to all parents, carers and family members. 

    Regards and goodwill,

    Hdan

Children
No Data