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Hello, Newly Diagnosed, relieved and wanting to connect

Ahhthatswhy
over 1 year ago

Hello, Im fresh off the diagnosis. Amazed, relieved and overwhelmed. Im having help to integrate this understanding of myself. But i want to connect with others. please say hello. I have always overfelt everything, light, smells, sounds, peoples emotions and not had a clue why i am so exhausted all the time from it. And now ahh that's why.... I am autistic.

Im 48, female, I will always get overwhelmed but this is my first step into connecting with others.

Please say hello

N

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

    Hi and welcome.  I'm new too.  At 55, I've spent many years wondering why I'm not like other people - knowing I'm autistic is going to help me look at my life in a more helpful way. I hope.  Being overwhelmed by sights, sounds, smells and people is something that sounds very familiar! I now know why I've been taking sandwiches to work my whole working life and avoiding the canteen at lunchtime...  

  • over 1 year ago in reply to Bumper

    Thank you Bumper, I always felt that i missed lessons that others learnt. With frustration and sadness I look back at the amount of effort i put into trying to pretend to fit in. Years of studying behaviour just so I could learn how to connect with and be like normal people, I hear the shadow ringing of 'why can't you just be normal' from teachers and adults said to me as a child. It's a bittersweet joy to find this now. 

    Is 55 now viewed as mid life? I hope so.... here to greater ease and self compassion for the time ahead.

    N

  • over 1 year ago in reply to Ahhthatswhy

    I’ve felt that sadness too, but I’m moving towards a sense of acceptance and compassion towards my younger self and all the difficulties I faced just trying to fit in. I used to blame myself a lot, and felt like a failure much of the time. Now I realise that I was in fact doing incredibly well just to keep my head above water, and try to get something out of life in terms of knowledge and fulfilment. I always tried my best, I always tried to be a good person, even though life was such a struggle and I was dealing with so much anxiety and loneliness. Thankfully when I met my husband my loneliness ended, but life hasn’t been easy. However I’m very grateful for all the good parts of my life and my autism diagnosis is helping me to be more at peace with the memories of many things that I struggled with. 

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  • over 1 year ago in reply to Ahhthatswhy

    I’ve felt that sadness too, but I’m moving towards a sense of acceptance and compassion towards my younger self and all the difficulties I faced just trying to fit in. I used to blame myself a lot, and felt like a failure much of the time. Now I realise that I was in fact doing incredibly well just to keep my head above water, and try to get something out of life in terms of knowledge and fulfilment. I always tried my best, I always tried to be a good person, even though life was such a struggle and I was dealing with so much anxiety and loneliness. Thankfully when I met my husband my loneliness ended, but life hasn’t been easy. However I’m very grateful for all the good parts of my life and my autism diagnosis is helping me to be more at peace with the memories of many things that I struggled with. 

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